Pattaya Motorbike Tour At 6:30 P.M. Saturday

Pattaya Motorbike Tour At 6:30 P.M. Saturday

All right. So, sun’s going down. Let me check the time here. What is it? It’s about about 5:30 overlooking the beautiful patio. The bay. It’s just beautiful here on a Saturday night. Nice cool breeze, like free air conditioning. You could not ask for better weather. It was hot today. It was sunny, perfect weather to be in the pool. So, I gave y’all a look around on a Friday morning when nothing’s going on. And now, I’ll take you around on a Saturday evening for a long motorbike tour. Now, I’m early. I’m not out at 9, 10, 11:00 or midnight like most folks. Uh, but you know what? What’s this what’s this show about? It’s about what I do, not what everybody else wants, what they do. It’s about what I do. So, uh, Kuwaitis are so noisy. Anyhow, it’s about what I do. So, this is the time that I go out. I’m going to take you on this motorbike ride and then, uh, I’m going to get me some kebabs and go home, lay up in the bed, and talk to my old lady and my babies. years ago, I would have been on walking street all night long, but times change. So, anyhow, I want to say thanks for joining me on this long, slow motorbike tour through the streets of Padia at by the time I get going. What time is it going to be? It’s like 5:35 right now. So, great time to come to Thailand right now. It’s a low season. There’s not many people here. It’s quiet. Yeah, there’s some stuff going on over at the border. That’s 100 miles away. Uh, my heart goes out to everybody over there affected by that, but here in good old Padia, we’re not affected by that, folks. So, anyhow, thanks for riding along with me. Certainly appreciate you being a loyal viewer here on my show. Here we go. And show you my horse here. Be taking you on this tour this Honda Super Cub, affectionately known as the Bad Dream. We’re up here at the viewpoint. Beautiful place to come check out a overview of Patia. And if you’re wondering why I fold that me that mirror down, it’s because my camera will focus on that mirror. I got a mirror over here on the left side. And I’m not going to be breaking any speed records. This is just going to be a slow roll. Yeah, it’s not the safest thing in the world to bend that mirror down, but uh the things I do to bring you good quality entertainment. Some of y’all say, “Man, he’s done this same route before.” That’s right. People change, businesses change. So, this is the updated tour. I took you on that long slow. Some might find it boring walking tour on a Friday morning. Went down third road to Pattua down Beach Road over to Soy Baka. And this one here, we’ll just go down second road. Come back up Beach Road. Don’t bite me, dog. Folks, these soy dogs most of the time are okay. Every now and then you’ll get a wild card that’ll come after you, try to take a bite out of your calf. So, I’m always wary because I don’t want to go get no rabies shots. All right, down the hill. And again, if you’re looking for uh any speed racing or any land speed records to be broken, it’s not going to happen on this trip. I’d really like to do this tour on my bicycle, which I’ve done many times in the past. But right now, the OG Chopper is sitting on two flats. I put new tires on her about a year ago, but when those little bitty bicycle tires sit up, uh, they don’t last very long. So, I got to get some new tires on the bicycle. The bicycle is really the greatest platform uh, for this type of filming. It’s just at the right speed. There’s no engine noise. You can take that thing pretty much anywhere. Park it anywhere. I prefer to do these tours on my bicycle. So, note to self, get some new tires on that bike. Okay. Come up this red light here. Come up to the red ball. It’s a good thing about driving a motorbike is you can weave in and out of the vehicular traffic, which is accepted practice here. All right, here we go. Saturday night already got some traffic. Fridays, Saturday nights, any festivals, anything like that. You don’t want to be riding around in a car in this area in Padia. You know, any anytime on the weekend, obviously it’s party time. A lot of people come down from Bangkok. It’ll take you forever to get from point A to point B. If you’re in a vehicle, you know, if you’re staying anywhere near the the action of beach road, it’s better just leave your car at the hotel, take a motorbike, taxi, walk. You know, would say by bus, but the bot bus is stuck in this stuff, too. You’re quicker to walk or take a motorbike. See, just take it real slow. Swear to crap. Hello. Take it real slow through here cuz people are just popping out trying to cross the road and a lot of them have been drinking. So, you definitely don’t want to hit a pedestrian. Go ahead, beautiful lady. I just take it low and slow. The motorbike taxi drivers, they’re obviously in a hurry because they’re trying to make a living. Just get out of their way, let them pass you up. They can go at their own speed. But this old Fong just takes it low and slow. So if any drunk steps out in front of me, I can react and not have any problems. Big old double-decker tour bus there. Beautiful bus. Haven’t seen too many buses on the streets since I’ve been back. So again, you might be watching the news and saying, “Oh, you know, Thailand’s going to war with Cambodia and martial laws been declared over there in some provinces next to the border.” Um, it’s not affecting operations here in Padia. For me, as a as a tourist, as an expat, this is a wonderful time. Why? Because there’s not a lot of people here. So, if you’re thinking about taking a trip, now is a perfect time. Unless you’re just into all the action and the added people of the high season. All right, caught up in a little lap traffic. Now, I’ll just weave my way through here slowly, get over here to the left, and let all the Ricky Racers go by me. We got on the exchange rate. Couldn’t see it over there. Going by too fast. That’s why if I’m on the bicycle, I can see all that stuff. Slow down. Park. Nobody cares where you leave your bicycle. And for those of you who are joining me who’ve never been here, basically to the left down these side so a block or so is Walking Street. So I’m just sort of paralleling Walking Street. you come to this light or again any of these so to the left, you’ll end up at Walking Street. But if you turn left at this light, that’s the entrance to Walking Street. Okay, soy 14 got a fresh green and we’ll be crossing over Thai. Now we’re on patio second road. This thing runs like a counterclockwise racetrack. Just like a NASCAR race. Feel like Ricky Bobby. Hit the gas and turn left. That’s what’s that’s what NASCAR is. So, it goes in this direction down Second Road and we’ll turn left up there at the Dolphin Roundabout and then it’ll come back the other direction on Beach Road. Again, I’m talking to folks who have never been to this town. So, if you take a left down these so you’re basically one block from the beach. And again, you got all kind of people crossing. They’re not always crossing in the crosswalks. Obviously, people are partying and drinking and having a good time and not paying attention. So low and slow is the way to go. that rhymes. Come through here like Ricky Racer and run into somebody. My goodness. It ain’t going to be a good night. So there you go. I’m full of public safety messages here. See that dude opening that car? If I were coming down through here wide open, you know, might not be a good situation, but I’m slow. All right. To the left is that Ripley’s Believe It or Not with the airplane on top of the building. Okay, we’ll just swing around this bot bus here. Little lap traffic. Bot bus slowing down. See how them gentlemen popped out in front of that? Just take it slow. And it’s just gridlock traffic like this, especially on the weekends. I mean, the traffic’s moving, but it’s moving slow. And what I’m going to do is head over to the left and get out of this middle lane here cuz I got a bunch of people behind me trying to get up through here. at a faster pace than I’m willing to go. But you don’t what you don’t do is get nervous and let people push you into going too fast. I think that’s where people get into trouble. They look in the rearview mirror and they see all this traffic and and they think that, oh my man, I got to speed up because they’re getting pissed off. Don’t let traffic push you. At least motorbike traffic. All right, got a group of beautiful ladies coming through there. And then I’ll take this opportunity, put my signal on, and get back over here to the left. Just a perfect evening to be out, folks. It’s just, like I said, it’s just cool. There’s a cool breeze blowing. It’s not the ball’s hot at night. I don’t care what you say. You show me a place that’s got better weather than Patty of Thailand, I’ll probably call on you. But I’ll check it out. But I don’t think you’re going to find a better place when it comes to weather. Yeah, that’s some raining that goes on. All right, I’ll just thread the needle through here. Patty and Night Bazaar off to the right side of the aircraft. Souvenirs and stuff in there. Used to go in there a lot. I had my favorite favorite vendors I’d known for a long time. And then like now you go in there and it’s it’s people who don’t speak Thai, people other nationalities. I have no idea who works in there now, but I I still have to go there, get my scarves. All right, so to the right is uh what does it say? Bar beer town. Bar call Myth Night. All these little bar complexes. Okay, so we’ll just thread the needle through here. Off to the left is Central Patia, one of uh say the center of gravity, the mall, but now you’ve got other malls, other shopping areas, but this is the center of gravity if you had to ask where’s the center of gravity. It’s like in the center of the action all the way around. Okay, we’ll just stop. Let these ladies go by. Let’s let this gentleman figure out what he’s doing. Slow. No problem. Let these gentlemen out of the crosswalk. Off to the right is Somerset Patio. Yeah. So central, it’s like the center center of the action. A lot of stuff goes on there. It’s where the Hilton is on top. Thai folks pronounce it Cintan by Cintan crap. So if you don’t know where to go, like you’re starting your night out, you can always just start out at Central, figure out where to go from there. All right. Young lady got a mobile dress operation there. You’ll be sitting in a bar and she’ll pull up. bar girls will jump out and start looking at those outfits and then next thing you know your drunk ass will be buying two three dresses. It’s the way it is. [Music] All right. And we’re coming up here to the light at Fatty Clown. Got the green ball, but I don’t know if we’ll make it through it. And once I get through this light, I’ll take the chance take the time to check my camera. Been let it does pretty good. But every now and then, you know, the gimbal will get pointed in a odd direction. So, uh, take a chance to pull over up here and reenter the gimbal, make sure everything’s good to go. I know everybody wants me to go down Soy 6, but I might not. I might just go down the back of Soy 6, not 6-1 where the lady boys hang out, but go down uh runway street food that that side and see what’s shaking over there. Folks, if you’re if you’re looking for a video to look at the girls or the coconut girls or whatever, this isn’t the video. Plenty of dudes that walk up and down beach road showing you the coconut girls with good equipment, good camera, good quality video. That’s not what I’m about. If I had to do that every night, god damn, it’d be like time to make the donuts. Be like working on an assembly line. Walking that same route every day, every night. couldn’t do it. My hats off to the people who do stuff like that. They’re absolute machines. Okay. A little bit further and then I got to check my camera. Ah, how about right here? Perfect. Pull over in front of these well more Indian restaurants. Okay, quick check of the camera. Reveal that everything is working just fine. Oh yeah, we’re good to go. Camera’s rocking out. I hope I got the right audio setting. I think I do. It’s been a few months since I’ve done one of these motorbike tours. Off to the left to Soy 6-1. Unless you like lady boys, don’t walk down that Soy late at night. And then immediately after that, here we go. The world famous Soy 6. Oh yeah, it’s packed out with ladies as usual. I wouldn’t say it’s packed out with people, but folks, it’s only 7 o’clock. So again, if you’re looking for uh to look at beautiful ladies in a video, you need to pick another show cuz they’ll go down that thing at like 10, 11:00 at night when everybody’s partying and booty shaking. Old single dad more interested in the street food action over here, if you want to call it that. Here we just call it food. And I’ll try to do a loop so you can get a good view of the aircraft. There’s a 747. This used to be just an open field. Nothing special. You see right here? It’s the backside of the world famous Soy 6. So what happened is they just pulled a damn 747 out here. And if you build it, they will come. You know, it sat out here for a while and then it was just uh stall set up. Now they’ve got it paved, lighting, you know, electrical, plumbing. It’s a proper spot now. So, I I’ll turn back around. I just wanted to show you the uh aircraft. It’s actually kind of hard to see now because of all the infrastructure they built. Then over to the left for 10 bot, they got proper toilets over there. Modern clean restroom facilities. 10 bot if you’re over here at the runway street food. All kind of shopping. You know, the vendors here have got a lot of the same stuff they have over there at Patty at Night Bazaar and I’m going to cut through the lot. Looks like a ferris wheel over there. We’ll bring the kids. Yeah. Let me cut through here. I’m trying not to run this gentleman over. things I do bring y’all quality entertainment. Yes, you got a little kiddy uh playground over there. You want to bring the kids? Got a bouncy house, little small ferris wheel. And again, where I’m at right there, you’re looking at Soy 6 right there. The back of Soy 6. So, if I were on the other side of those buildings, you get to see all the beautiful ladies. But that just not where the wind is taking me. The wind is taking me down this path. And you, the viewer, you got to go with me. You know, some of y’all watching, you live here. Some of y’all watching, you haven’t been here in a year. Some of y’all watching, you haven’t been here since the 70s or the 80s. That’s why I got to kind of keep it like basic. Some of y’all are sitting there looking trying to remember when you pulled in here with the US Navy, you know, back in the 70s and you don’t recognize the place cuz this place used to be a little fishing village. Now look at it now. Still paradise, my friends, but obviously things have changed. Let’s come out here. Ease on out. And then here you go. So to the left is Soy 6. the other way. And again, soy six is always going to be soy six. So, where do you go to party here if you’ve never been here? Soy ba Soy 6. You got big money, okay? Go up in them go- goes on walking street. If you got big money, if you’re on a budget, that’s not where you need to go. Okay. So, we’ll just follow play follow the leader through here. These crosswalks have got red lights up on them. I don’t know if they got cameras or not, but I try to obey all of the traffic laws. Number one, I don’t want to make I don’t want to make friends with the police unnecessarily. And you know, Patty has got some pretty good technology, so who knows what kind of cameras they got. Just obey the damn traffic law clause. It’s just much easier that way. All right. Wow, that’s a beautiful swank place right there. I don’t even know the name of it. Right before Twin Palms Resort. Never been up in there. It’s right here before the Hard Rock Cafe. little dude right there. Okay. Hard Rock Cafe off to the left. Maybe I just said that. Again, folks, it’s early. It’s uh like 5 minutes after 700 p.m. on a Saturday night. Okay? So, don’t say, “Oh, there’s nobody in patio.” Folks, it’s early. It’s 7 o’clock. But this ain’t like a menu to say, “Hey man, go down at 12:30.” Like, no. Not a grab driver. This ain’t Burger King. [Music] All right. It’s a faded barber shop. Uh, wow. Beautiful older ladies right there. Little older models. Okay. Now, do I fight the traffic to Walking Street? And I would say no, because I can’t drive the motorbike down Walking Street. There’s a lot of traffic from here to Walking Street. I think my time would be better spent taking you down soya because I can drive my motorbike down soy baca and selfishly I’m getting hungry and I got a kebab calling my name. So right now selfishly that’s all I’m thinking about. Get me a kebab, bag of chips, go lay up, call the old lady. All right, let’s go. Let’s run the gauntlet. Had plenty of time. Just had to go with the man in black in front of me. That’s the only time you’re going to see me speed during this whole thing. Just went with that gentleman. All right. So, we’ll ease our way up here and we’ll turn right bearing 09 or zero onto Soy Bow. And now that I say that, this video probably will get limited ads. I mean, I’m I don’t know. I’m talking when I walk around there at 7 in the morning, I’m the only person there. But if I start talking all these names, saying Soy 6, Soy Bailey, all the club names, stuff like that, YouTube is so smart. They say that’s not fit for uh advertisers. Like, hell, I’m the only person on the damn street. I’m looking at empty buildings. My goodness. Okay, it’s almost almost to our spot and we will just ease over here. There we go. Let that gentleman come on by. Oh, and he cuts right through the gate. I talked about obeying the traffic laws. And I’m videoing myself. So, I guess I’ll let this gentleman out and I’ll come up here past the crosswalk and I’ll just turn right. There we go. I don’t know if that was any more legal, but I didn’t want to cut through those barriers. Ah, what the hell? Nobody’s perfect. off to the right where you see that barber pole. If you want a manicure pedicure, go in there. Uh 150 each. So manicure pedicure is I think 300 bot. Beautiful ladies in there. Speak uh perfect English. They’re used to dealing with the lungs and they do the best manicure pedicure here in Patty. I tell them Marco sent you. And trust me, if you’re my age or older, you need a manicure and a pedicure once a month. Trust me, don’t think you can do that yourself and be no. Just go see my friends in there. You be glad you did once you get used to it. Okay, so we’re on Soy Bau. This is uh if you’re partying in this town, this is where you got to come to. 20 years ago, everybody went to Walking Street. But there was a shift. And you know what Walking Street is missing right now? They’re missing the damn Walking Street sign. It don’t even look the same. You know, they took all the signage down. They made it where there’s no overhead signage on Walking Street. supposedly because they couldn’t get the fire trucks through there, the ladder trucks. Okay, I get it. It’s a safety issue. But now the Walking Street sign is down. They got to get that thing back up because that’s that’s iconic. But if you’re looking to party and uh you know, chase the ladies, this is this is the street that you need to be on. and these soy that branch off of it. Only reason I go to Walking Street is to go to the beer garden to eat and I drive through there during the day cuz it’s just my cut through. And you know if you want hardcore, you go to Soy 6. Okay. Off to the right is Tree Town. Another like a little horseshoe in there. It’s like a little horseshoe bar complex. Sort of like LK Metro, but it’s newer, bigger, newer. I don’t want to say improve. It’s a newer version. You know, people say, “Where do you go? Where’s a good bar to go to in patio? Where’s a good restaurant? Well, right here to the left. If you like hamburgers, go to Prime Burger. But this is a town where there’s thousands of places to eat and thousand a thousand bars. I don’t know exact number, but you can’t recommend any place here. There’s just too much. And it’s all good. All right. All right. Now, when you’re coming through these areas, like I said, just let the let the pedestrian traffic have the right away. Give them a wide birth. Okay. Here’s the rock factory live music club. It is packed out and the band is about to come on. I don’t know if it’s a special band or what, but it is standing room only. It must be some type of special event. That place is packed. or else they’ve just got a really good house band that people are uh willing to line up to go see. Okay, caught up in some lab traffic. No problem. There you go. So, she’s coming through on the bicycle. I like riding my bicycle. It’s just easier to get through. That’s a That’s got to be some type of electric bike, right? Looks like a battery in the middle. I don’t know. I’ve never had an electric bike. I’m I’m not even cool with electric bikes because what’s a bicycle? You’re supposed to pedal the damn thing, get some exercise, and enjoy nature. Now you got a motor on a bicycle. It’s not really a bicycle. You can’t call it an electric bicycle. It’s a motorbike. Has a motor. It’s no longer a bicycle when you put a motor on it. All right. So, I’ll thread the needle through here. Ease on up a little bit. Beautiful lady right on the bicycle. has bar to the right called a pink devil. Pretty good on the graphics though. Graphics, logo, folks. Graphics and logos and name. It really don’t mean when you’re trying to open a damn bar. It’s all about the chicks that are out in front of that place. All right. Now, I’m going to take you down this one. And that’s that’s my night. I heard they made some improvements to the pavement here. Looks like Yep. Got some freaking pavement. Wow. Where all the potholes at? They’re gone. So, this is uh if you’ve never been here before, I don’t know how would you compare this spot. comparable sort of. Go ahead, sir. Comparable to soy six in a way. So, so many uh different options. Where do you tell people to go? There’s just too many to recommend anything. Just get your ass over here and figure it out for yourself for the most part. But okay, you want a recommendation up here on the right, go to Aman’s Bar. A M O N apostrophe S right there to the right. Go to Aman’s Bar. Tell them Marco sent you. Shout out to that gentleman selling lottery tickets from his wheelchair out hustling. Heart goes out to him. Hope he sells every damn ticket he’s got so he can go home, have an early evening. Okay, folks. So, that right there pretty much concludes the uh motorbike tour. I want to thank you for joining me. Again, I could ride around this town all night long and not show you half of what it has to offer. Just hit some key points. Food everywhere, bars everywhere, beautiful ladies everywhere. All right, gentlemen on the bicycle. Lance Armstrong. Whoa. Got to go left to avoid that vehicle. So with that folks again welcome to Patia Thailand. It’s my paradise. I will see y’all on the next one. And peace out. Wow, look at this beautiful girl in front of me. Beautiful hair. Wow, she’s quick. She’s quick on that scoopy scooby-Doo. whatever it is. But the kebab, that chicken kebab is on my mind. It holds more weight right now than the beauty of the ladies. But but wait but wait there’s more. Just when you thought I was going to take her to the barn, old single dad pulls a rabbit out of his hat. Bears left. bears left about about 2 niner or zero and heads back down towards walking street. Heading in the vicinity in the direction of walking street. You know why? Because life is short and you only live once, my friends. You only live once. Boom. back on Patty Clang headed towards the beach and we’re going to we’re going to be banking left and head towards Walking Street and I’ll show y’all that the Walking Street sign is gone. Ain’t nothing there. And everybody keeps saying on the internet the patio is overrun by folks from India. Yeah, there’s a lot of Indian restaurants here. Yeah, there’s a lot of tourists from India. Okay, you got me. But there’s a lot of tourists from everywhere. There’s a lot of tourists from Russia, not so much Chinese right now. They’re not thick at all, but there’s there’s tourists from everywhere. This is truly an international city. Remember that song from the 80s, The Great American Melting Pot? The great American melting pot. Well, guess what? Padia is a melting pot of different folks, different countries, different nationalities. You can come here and say, “Man, there’s Russians everywhere. Man, there’s Ukrainians everywhere.” Well, you go to Pratam Knack, there’s a lot of Russians over there. I agree. Reenter the gimbal. We’re still holding good. You come to certain areas, you’ll say, “Damn, there’s a lot of Kuwaitis. These Kuwaiti kids come over here and rent these big motorbikes. They hang out in certain so and raise hell all night.” Well, if you go over there, you’re going to complain about the Kuades. Go to Pratamnack, you’ll say, “Damn, there’s a lot of Russians. Just quit complaining.” Or keep complaining and don’t come here. That means there’s more room for me, more ladies for me. Up to you. Up to you, Tilac. Oh, wow. This lady right here, I love her boots. She’s got those Kiss type boots on. See, my old lady would look good in stuff like that, but she just doesn’t like fashion. Shout out to you, Fatima. I bought her a pair of leather zip up boots. I got pictures of her. She looked absolutely gorgeous in them. wore them for the pictures, took them to the village, dropped them off, they went into a black hole, never to be seen again. So, if I bought if I take on a pair of those boots, she never wear them. All she wears is flip flops. All she’s into is comfort wear. Doesn’t want to listen to old single dad’s fashion tips. Speaking of fashion, off to the left is AMA Fashion. If you’re a man and you’re looking for a custommade suit going to AMA fashion and order you up a three-piece suit, tell them Marco sent you. Show them this video. I don’t know if it’ll get you a discount, but that’s another question I get asked all the time, so I’ll keep repeating myself. People, hey man, where can I get a good suit mate? Right there. AMA fashion. Um, you watch any of my old videos, you’ll see me rocking some suits that that I got from there. Look like a damn gangster. Dressed better than John Gotti. Reasonable price. So, like if you’re coming over here for one one time, go in there, order you three suits, about five shirts. Holy You’ll go back to the states and people think you’re rich or they think you’ve been hit the lottery or something cuz in the states you can’t afford to buy three custom suits. You got to buy off the rack at J C Penney that that don’t fit that’s like three sizes too big. You look sloppy as hell. You’d be better off. But truth be told, most people in America because they buy that offtheshelf stuff, you look better if you just got a pair of khakis and a golf shirt and tucked it in and got some dress shoes. You look better than going and getting a sloppy ass suit that don’t fit you. And you can’t afford to get a handmade suit in America. So therefore, in America, I I don’t recommend you go buy a suit unless you got big money. You got small money, just uh golf shirt tucked in, but you come to patio, you would be very wise to invest in at least one three-piece suit custom made to your body, and you’ll love it. cuz most most dudes don’t like wear or you don’t like wearing a suit because it doesn’t fit. It’s like wearing a you know if you’re a medium and you’re wearing a XL t-shirt, it’s the same thing. That’s why you don’t like wearing a suit. But if you get a suit that’s fit to your body, you will enjoy wearing it. It’s comfortable. All right, so coming up here, um police station off to the left and central And being that we’re in front of the police station, highly recommend you stop for this one. I recommend you obey all the traffic laws for everyone’s safety, but certainly pay attention to this light in front of the police station. My goodness. 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 one. Got the green. We’re cleared to go. Pretty simple. Don’t get in a big hurry. Oh, other public service announcement. Wear a damn helmet. Especially when you come by the police station. You’re not wearing a helmet. They know you’re a tourist. They know what you ain’t got no license. Go right ahead. I got something going on out here. Some special event on the stage. Not sure what’s up. Oh, it’s a art expedition. It’s an art exhibition. That gentleman was bringing a painting up there and it was beautiful. I saw some beautiful art in the Clark airport as well. All right, let’s check out on the beach. What’s going on? Are there hordes of Indian tourists sleeping on the beach? Uh, no. Are there a few Indian folks on the beach like everybody else? Yes. I can only report to you what I see. Okay? I saw these pictures floating around the internet that showed hordes of Indian folks camping like sleeping on the beach, but I’m here and I don’t see that. I’m not going to be here at like 11:00 when everybody gets sleepy. I’ll be at my house. I’ll be at my ranch. my crib. The patio sign over there is lit up. It’s looks like it’s flashing. They were putting the finishing touches on it. I got to get out of this person’s way. Off to the left, Tahesian Queen. supposedly the oldest bar in patio. I got to I got to slide left. I got somebody behind me, Ricky Racer. Yeah, but they were putting the finishing touches on the sign when I was here last. And it’s lit up. Beautiful. I’ll have to take y’all over there for a walking tour. right, you know, at the sign, under the sign. You can go over there and there a little viewing like deck area in front of the sign. Okay. Cannabis store off to the left. They’ve rolled back the marijuana laws or supposedly they did. I don’t know nothing about the marijuana laws. I told y’all before I’m not into that. I don’t go in them shops. Uh did they roll it back to where it’s medicinal only? I I don’t know. Okay. Got a red light here and we’ll just follow the leader. Beautiful ladies over on the beach. Do I see the multitude of Indian folks sleeping on the beach? Nope. All right, so we’re rolling Patia Beer Garden off to the right. My favorite restaurant in the world. If you want to get to the Patty Pattia Beer Garden, right here coming up to the right. Okay, right here. That sign says Patia Beer Garden and underneath it there’s a a weed symbol. Take a right right down that alley and go to the patio beer garden. Best restaurant in the world. Now look at here. The walking street sign is gone. The pillars are there. The sign is nowhere to be found. I’ll just try to give you a look up through my goodness. Through walking street, show you what’s going on. U you know, you can’t go up through there with the motorbike. And again, folks, it’s early, okay? Oh, this place has changed up. It’s called Glam. It’s early, so don’t judge everything on a tour at 7:30 at night. People are just now probably getting ready to go out. They’re just now getting ready. Okay, so it’s roughly 7:30 in that vicinity. Now I will sign off. That’s it. The kebab is like a It’s calling my name. It’s like a tractor beam. And I’m not telling you where my secret kebab spot is. Some of y’all might have figured it out. But I don’t advertise that cuz there’s already too many customers over there anyhow. Toucom off to the right side of the aircraft where this says Starbucks. Um, TCOM is like floors of cell phones, computers, computer repair, all kind of electronic gadgets in there. All right. Friendship Market off to the right. Chinese grocery way back in the day. That’s where you had to go if you wanted some like imported barbecue sauce from America. It was that place and one more that imported stuff. Folks, that’s way back in the day. You can get anything you want here in Thailand. Now, one of the early videos on my channel, I filmed a Chinese New Year celebration there at Friendship Market where they had this little boy up on this pole. And you’ll have to watch it. I don’t want to give up the ghost, but it scared the crap out of everybody in real life when it happened. And it’s scary to watch the video. One of the first videos. So, if you go to the tab where it says oldest, it’s like the second or third video I think I posted on this platform. All right. Off to the right is Tony’s little open air gym. And with that, I’m signing off. I’m going to sign off. I’m about to turn right, but if I do, I would be tempted to take you over to Soy 5 on Pratamnac and see what’s happening at the hard eight saloon. Man, old single dad is going to be starving by the time I get back to the ranch, but looks like I’m going to do it. You know why? Why? Because life is short. My camera’s still going. Flawless. Wireless mic still got energy in it. Next stop, Hard Saloon, Soy Five Bratthamnack. Then I will cut left along the beach and then I’ll take you over to JTM Beach. We’ll take a look at the bullet bar and then I’ll probably have to call it. Is that fair? I think that’s fair. I want to make sure you get your money’s worth on this show cuz some of y’all complain about that walking tour. That was the boringest walking tour. Some of y’all don’t read the title. Long slow walking tour on a Friday morning. Wow. Beautiful girls everywhere. But that’s something that you just don’t have to say here in Southeast Asia. Everywhere you look, there’s beautiful ladies. Where, you know, in my country, you got to you got to if you look one direction, look another direction, maybe that third or fourth direction, you’ll see a stunner. Here, everywhere you look, you you see stunningly beautiful ladies. Big difference. When you first get here, you have to really be careful or you’ll crash a damn motorbike. I mean, you you’ll just be like, “Holy crap, that girl’s beautiful.” Now, I got It’s the right arrow. Okay, we got one late coming through. Okay, right turn bearing 09 or zero. Clear to go with throttle up. Just got a little speed here. Get into the flow of traffic. Should have went a little bit wider around that truck in case that dude opened the door at the last minute. Grab driver rolling strong. Needs my tail light though. All right, go with visor down just for a second. We’ll pick up a little speed cuz really really nothing to be dillydallying about through here. There’s a few bars, few little spots, but basically I’m looking for the express to get us over Pratamnac soy 5. Soapon food court off to the left side. Folks, this is Thailand, okay? Everywhere you go is delicious food. You don’t have to hunt it down. You contrast that to the Philippines, you got to hunt down good food. Most of the time, you’re going to pay a premium price. If you want good food over there, you got to pay. That’s just the way it is. You don’t go to the Philippines for the local food. You come to Thailand for the local food. I mean, literally just pull into anywhere. I could pull into that stall, that stall, that stall. You’re going to get the most delicious food um at a very reasonable I don’t want to use the word cheap because it would say the food is cheap. No, the the beautiful, delicious food at the most reasonable price you’ve ever paid. They say Thailand is the world’s kitchen, and it damn sure is. Okay, got everybody stacking up. Look, if you’re just joining me, I’m in the green. There’s a green painted area. That’s where the motorbike stage. And then this red area is the pedestrian crosswalk. But, you know, it gets it gets crowded. But if you want to talk about where you’re supposed to park, it’s in the green right before the crosswalk. the cars will hang back. You pull up around them into the green and stage. That’s how it’s supposed to go. But a lot of times, again, crosswalk just gets crowded. I try to stay in the green cuz I got a ticket before for pulling out in that crosswalk over there on second row when I was going through my divorce. Y’all heard that story million times. My mind was somewhere else. All right. There’s more than one way to skin a cat. Since we went that other way when we started this tour, I’ll just go ahead and bank left here. We’ll bank left. Bearing 270, come up the hill and then we’ll turn right, which will put us we’ll be vetored into uh Frathamnac. All right, get a little speed coming up this hill. [Music] [Music] All right, to the left here, Mike’s Mexican Restaurant. Okay, Mike’s Mexican Restaurant. It’s Thrafaya Soya. Soy 5, notice. But Mike’s Mexican restaurant. You want some good Americanstyle Mexican food, that’s where you go. It’s one of the places you go eat. Been eating there for years. you go up in there, you’ll be like, “Damn, I’m an American at a Mexican restaurant. Okay, so we’re still everything operating in the green. Coming up to the green ball here, but we’re going to be taking a right hand turn bearing 0 niner 0. Okay. Now, there’s no green paint here, but the red paint is the crosswalk. So, don’t pull up into the red paint. All right. But we got a fresh green arrow to the right. You may proceed, Captain. Take it wide. This puts us in the direction of where I started the tour up on that hill. But we’re not going to go all the way back to the hill. We’re looking for Soy 5 right here in the fratamnack area. You come over here, you’d be like, there’s a lot of Russian folks over here. Well, yeah, it’s fratamnack hill or just fratamnack. Just ease on over. Let Ricky Racer go on by. Really what I want to see, what I’m looking for is what’s going on at the hard eight saloon. All right. So, go ahead and signal Soy five brat neck left turn bearing 270. Buy Thai Boxing Gym off to the right. I miss going to my little gym. Basically, my instructor was like Mr. Miyagi. Usually, I was the only only person over there other than his uh daughter and his son who were also Muay Thai fighters. Old single dad trying to keep up. Best shape I’ve ever been in in my life. I could get back to that once I get back over here fulltime. I will get back to that. Okay. Couple of bars off to the left with some beautiful ladies. Again, folks, we’re in the low season. Okay. It’s a low season. A lot happening around the world right now. So, it’s a very slow low season from what I’ve heard and what now what I’m seeing. But again, for tonight, it’s 7:40. It’s still early. So, I might be giving you a skewed uh perspective of what goes on on a Saturday night. All I can give you is what I do in my life. That’s what this show is about. It’s about where the wind blows this guy. And tonight by 8:00 it’s going to blow me back over to the ranch and I’ll be in for the night. Not a night owl anymore. Okay, getting down into some action. This is the place I like here. It’s called Benny’s Roadhouse patio. And I just love the signage. Just the signage there. Just beautiful facade and the sign. Great job on that. And of course, some beautiful ladies sitting out front. More beautiful ladies everywhere. Okay. So, got a little what we call John Candy action going on. If you ever seen that movie when they’re coming the wrong way at you, people were using that term in Iraq. You say John Candy left, John Candy right, it meant people are coming in coming at you in the wrong direction. So look out. All right. To the right. Hard eight saloon. Yeah, I got some beautiful ladies up in there. Okay. Plenty of plenty of beautiful ladies. Now, are is the band still playing there? I don’t know because it’s too early. The band probably starts at 9:00 if I had to guess. I don’t know. Speculating like Ron Burgundy. But if you want to you want to listen to some great music, go to my playlist, my music playlist, and it says beautiful Filipinos singing at the Hardight Saloon. Went up in there that night. Man, what a great band. She’s got a great voice. I hope she’s still there. I might have to sneak up in there. Check it out. All right, another John Candy left here. No problem. Go around them. So, this is Soy 5. So, over here on Fractamnack, definitely check out Soy 5. Soyha hard eight saloon and also right down here at the end is a nice 7-Eleven with some seating right next to the water. So you can come down here get you a beer at 7-Eleven prices. If you’re on a budget or you’re broke, spend all your money at Soy Six. You come over here. Now they look like they took the tables out. Sit here. Maybe I spoke too soon. There’s still a table or two. Hey, they got some tables closer to the 7-Eleven. Anyhow, the water’s right in front of you. This is the beach. We’re going to turn left here. Let these fine folks go ahead. And again, the beach is right there to the right. Well, obviously it’s to the right. Gentleman selling corn. So, what we’re going to do is just follow the beach from Soy 5 over to Jontian Beach. Does that make sense? Follow the beach to Jontian Beach. I guess it makes sense. Let me check the camera. Oh, yeah. We’re still recording. Hopefully, this whole trip hasn’t been focused on that mirror. It usually does not when I fold it down, but if the mirror is up, it will focus on that mirror. No way around it unless I mount it on the handlebars and then it’s too uh uh shaky. But you want to know what I’m filming on? I’m filming on the Osmo Pocket 3. I’ve got the DJI wireless mic mounted in my helmet with the setting all the way down on the lowest uh lowest audio level. And if I just talk quiet, this is what you get. And I’ve just got the camera in my pocket, my right breast pocket on my vest. What’s cool about it, it’s just sitting in that pocket. I can take this thing out and shoot over this way. Then I can just put it back in my pocket without messing anything up. And every now and then, I just pull it out, double click to recenter the gimbal, and make sure everything’s good. Goes back in the pocket, and it’s pretty damn good at low light. If you buy an action cam, okay, yeah, it’s it’s great. It’s durable. It’s waterproof, but at night it sucks. It’s useless at night. That’s where the Osmo Pocket 3 beats it. If you’re going to do anything inside low light at night, buy the Osmo Pocket 3 over the action cam. With that said, if you drop this little camera, it might be the end of it. It’s not uh it’s not an action cam. Okay, over to the right, we’ve got uh volleyball. I don’t know how many courts we got going. One, two, three, four, five, six, seven. I don’t even know. I’m not even sure how many volleyball courts. There’s a swing out there. Couple swings, tree swings. Got to love this place, folks. If you’re into fitness, you’re into fitness or you need to get in shape, this is where you need to come. Now, it’s a double-edged sword because you could easily work out during the day or walk or whatever and then go drink your ass silly all night long with the bar girls and then gain even more weight. You got to figure out which way you want to go. You want to get in shape. You want to lose weight. You come over here for 30 days, do Muay Thai, and just eat Thai food and walk around the beach. You’ll go home uh I I hate to even say you you’ll go home 50 lbs lighter. You could, but a lot of dudes, they come over here and try that, but they end up gaining it all back at night. you they’re doing some type of uh activity or the Muay Thai during the day and then they just drink at night. It’s useless. Not useless. You have a great time, but you’re not going to go home a lean, mean fight machine with that routine. That’s what really I should have done 15, 20 years ago. Started some type of fat camp. some type of weight loss camp because there’s a neverending supply of customers in America that have just gotten worse over the past 15 years. You might be one of them. You know, if you’re 400 lb listening to my voice, I promise you 100%. I bet my left nut. You come over here for 30 days, I’m going to take it I take a huge portion of that fat off your ass if you just follow my routine and I’m not into drugs or what what’s that shot that everybody’s taking in America now to lose weight that they’ll be class action suit in 10 years because it causes cancer. You know how the cycle come out with a great drug, market it, everybody everybody wants to take it, the doctors prescribe it, everybody gets rich, and then 10 years later, now it’s the lawyer’s turn to get rich cuz that is killing you, right? Who loses? The idiots who take this Yeah. Got a beautiful band off to the left. Anyhow, yeah, that’s what I should have started. Some type of weight loss program, drug free. Just come over to Patio. Give me 30 days. If you’re 400 lb, I’ll send you home at least 300. Give me another 30 days. I’ll take another 50 off. Guaranteed. All right. All right. Now, what I’m going to do, okay, now we pop out JTM Beach Road and I’ll just bear left and we’ll check out the bullet bar over here to the left. Try to shoot to the left offset a little bit. Hopefully that shooting to the left. Here’s the bullet bar next to Escobar. Okay. And there’s a band in there. I’m going to come back by and see if that’s my Filipino band because they told me when they were playing over there a year or two ago, whenever the hell it was, that they played the hard eight and they played the u the bullet bar. So, I’ve got to swing her around here without getting causing any accident. Me swing her back around and just go take a gander and see if that’s them. You got a place called Viper A Go. Beautiful ladies out there doing what ladies do these days, playing on their cell phone. All right, so let me check out the bullet bar. Plenty of customers. Looks like full house. I don’t know. I don’t know. I couldn’t see. But they do have a band. It’s uh 10 minutes till 8. The band’s playing at the bullet bar. John T and Patty Beach sign off to the right. Me and my buddy named that nicknamed that thing the ugly boat back when they were building it. It was just a concrete structure. My buddy’s like, “Where where do you want me to meet you?” He’s like, “Meet me at that uh that uh that that ugly boat.” I’m like, “Oh, yeah. I know what you’re talking about.” Then, of course, you know, a few months later, they got the sign on there. It’s beautiful. But back when it was just concrete, that’s the only thing he could think of to describe it and knew exactly what he was talking about. Okay. Can’t really see what’s going on on the beach to the right. Just a few people out on the beach. You know, Jontian is a lot quieter, more tame than the patio beach side. Immigration is down this soy to the left. So, high Soy 5. So, if you need to go get your visa renewed, Jontian uh Jontian Beach Soy 5. Jontian Soy Ha. Just bear in mind there’s a difference between JTen and Njtien. Opal House off to the left. Again, just beautiful, cool, breezy evening. Okay, here’s the gentleman right here. He’s famous around Patia with the flags. You’ve seen him before in my videos. Um, sort of looks like Carabal. Quite a character. He sells the fried bugs and stuff. There’s a wine bar. Pretty cool how you can go right there Thailand. You can go in a a beautiful expensive wine bar and get some delicious wine. Then outside you got a gentleman selling fry bugs. Both ends of the spectrum. You got a little pat of you. Okay, to the left is uh John TM boat house where the Elvis show is going down. I think he starts at 9ine. I just went by, but I went by too fast to uh to look and see what’s going on. But if you’re here and if they’re I’m making the assumption he’s still maybe it’s just on the weekends. I don’t know. Anyhow, if the Elvis show is going on, go over there and catch that Elvis show. Great food there, too. You want to see an old video, go over that. Go over the videos and go to oldest and just keep scrolling up. You’ll see the Elvis show. I don’t know, 2015 somewhere in there. Little print off to the right here for the children. Can’t wait to bring my kids there. Play at the playground right here on the beach while uh Okay, I got the green. So, I’ll go across and you can go shopping here at the Jen Night Market off to the left. So, I’ll try to offset the camera to shoot off to the left. Just another night market. food, shopping, everything you want there in a little night market. If you’re over here on the Jontian side, that’s a popular spot at night. Okay, let me get back to uh centering the gimbal. It looks like we’re still operating in the green. Now folks, I could take you all the way down to show you the seafood restaurant, Tulip House, the Wombat, the Black Horse, little bar com, little three, four bars right there. If you’re not familiar, you haven’t been here in a while, John Beach Road is one way is one way up to, unless they’ve changed it, it’s one way up to Chiarook and then from Chiarook down to the end, uh, is two-way, but right through here is, uh, one way, so you Can’t turn around. Got to go up to Chire Brook. Pull the racetrack. Well, you know what I mean. To the right. It’s the boat launch. The boat ramp. Okay. No lights. Just keep going. Daisy D’s saloon. Okay, so there is a Daisy D’s open and I think the sign said they were I don’t know. I can’t remember. Are they affiliated with Daisy D’s over in Angelie City? I think that’s what the sign said. I’m not sure. Anyhow, Daisy D’s right there right before the temple. It’s open. Beautiful place. Looked like there was a sign that had Stella on a draft. Can’t be for sure. It’s going too fast. That’s why it’s better to be on the bicycle. But I’m getting hungry. I’m getting hungry. And so I keep driving faster. Another market off to the left here. Okay. [Music] It’s another night market. Food. And then if you’ll look over to the right, the beach over here is crowded with folks chilling, eating, families gathering in the the lawn chairs, folding camp chairs, and you got all kind of uh street vendors, street food here. So, a lot of people out enjoying enjoying the beach, playing the guitar, just having a good time on a Saturday night. If that’s more of your lifestyle, more of the scene, just chilling, you know, you’re better off over here on the Johnian side. More chill, more family oriented. That’s just one man’s opinion. I mean, if my old lady and kids were here, yeah, I’d take them over there. We go to Central, go shopping. If there’s a event, yeah, I would go over there. But just to go walk around the beach on a average night, nah, I’d bring them over here to the Jian side. Just quieter. Does that make sense? That’s just me. All right, more folks out on the beach and camp chairs. Beautiful place over here to the left, D Beach. All right, I’m going have to recenter my gimbal. Folks, the things I do to bring you good quality entertainment. I mean, my stomach sacrificing my stomach hunger pains. You might be able to hear my hunger pains on this wireless mic. No, I’m just kidding. I’m just kidding, folks. But I did I did plan on just uh going that initial leg of the tour. But it’s just such a beautiful night. Everything’s still going. Still got battery life. Nothing’s overheating. And just a little lap traffic here. No problem. Just exercise some patience. I could probably fit through this little spot. But uh when it’s too tight like that, don’t get in a big hurry cuz if you scratch somebody’s mirror or some like that, my gosh. Then you talk about wa uh not wasting but taking up a lot of your time when you could have just waited a minute or so, got a bigger spot to go through. patience. Especially if you’re on vacation or you’re retired, you ain’t got nowhere to be. Leave your watch in the hotel room. I mean, I’m wearing a watch right now, but if I were out partying, I wouldn’t be I wouldn’t be wearing a watch or carrying a phone or nothing. just go out with some cash in my pocket, enjoy myself, not even worry about what time it is and not get in a big hurry. Okay, I see this one. I got enough room. So, no problem. I’ll proceed. Come up here with this gentleman. Actually, I think what I’ll do is I’ll just turn left here a little bit while the coast is clear. And look at that. Got jammed up anyhow. No big deal. See, this gentleman can’t go nowhere. So, I just slow roll it. Take it real slow. Real slow. And then play follow the leader. Cuz these cars ain’t going nowhere. They can’t move. That’s the joy in having a motorbike versus a car. Why don’t you buy your family a car? If I were in a car, the trip that I just took you on, I don’t know, was there hour of footage? Hour and a half of footage, maybe two hours. Probably would have took me five hours. Okay, now I’m going to ease. You know what that now? That’s still gridlock. I’m about to call it a night cuz I’m hungry. So, I’m not taking y’all down to the end where the seafood restaurants are. I’m about to conclude this cuz I got to go get something to eat. I’m hungry and I know just the perfect spot. Maybe I’ll get kebabs tomorrow night. I know just the perfect spot to get something to eat. So, I’ll take this time say thank you again for being a loyal viewer here on my show. If you’re not a subscriber, you know what to do. Just make sure you hit that damn notification bell or YouTube ain’t going to notify you and then you’ll be complaining to me I didn’t get notified. That’s cuz only like 2% of y’all click that damn notification bell. You subscribe, but you ain’t get notified unless you check on that check that bell. And I’ll take this time to tell you about our membership plan. Got over a 100 videos that are members only. Some of them are like too racy for ads. I said, you know what? Let’s just make those members only. So, check out the membersonly uh section videos. I recently redid it. Got a bargain price on there. I’m the world’s shittiest salesman. Y’all ever figure that out? I can’t sell nothing. If you’re a good salesman, what a skill. I wish I had them skills. I don’t got them skills. All right. Got a little underground cable work going in. Electrical cable. So, no problem. We’ll just sit here and hold tight. I just wanted to show you all this this spot up here. Oh, that’s a puppy dog right there. Now, if I go by, I could get through, but is he going to take a bite out of my uh Looks like they can’t get any anywhere anyhow, so I’ll just hold short of this beautiful little puppy dog in the back seat. Hey, puppy. With my luck, I’d go by and he’d take a bite out of my arm. He’s probably friendly, but you never know. Again, don’t get in a big rush. When you get in a big rush, that’s when things happen. I can’t get through there anyhow. Hey, puppy. That’s a good old dog right there. He just chilling. All right, folks. I’m out of here. See y’all on the next one. And peace out. Yeah. [Music] [Music] Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. [Music] La. [Music] Ah. La [Music] a [Music] [Music] [Laughter]

Join me for a motorbike tour through the streets of Pattaya on a beautiful Saturday evening. I’ll be firing up the motorbike around 6:30 PM.

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