I watched every PUPPET MASTER movie ever made!

I watched every PUPPET MASTER movie ever made!

Ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow I cannot see out of this mask it’s stabbing me right in the eyes Halloween Friday 13th nightmare in Elm Street all of these are Staples in the horror movie genre but what if I told you there is

One franchise that you may not have heard of that has a number of movies that surpasses all of them that franchise is Puppet Master created by the Puppet Master himself Charles ban and his Studio full moon features these movies start from 1989 and are still going on today with 15 movies in the

Franchise and a 16th being worked on right now not to mention the fact there’s comic books a video game this franchise has gone under the radar for years so for the next 15 days I am challenging myself to watch every Puppet Master movie per day why am I doing

This I I don’t know I guess I got nothing going on now that being said let’s get into it we got six dead bodies three breaths I would say who’s going to star in it but come on let’s face it we’re here to watch killer puppets so the movie

Starring blade Jester Pinhead tler Leech Woman and Shredder con written by Kenneth Hall and Joseph kot directed by David scholer so the movie takes place in 1939 with a Puppeteer go figure uh named Andre tulon which uh get used to that name by the way he’s in a hotel

Finishing off a puppet so two men in black show up at the hotel break in and tulan just kills himself this is the first 3 minutes of the movie and then the puppets are just already alive and then it jumps to present day which is 1989 which is when your boy was Born then we see a guy with hair like huie Lewis is just having a dream about a guy holding a gun to a woman and then he starts to bleed which you’re starting to think why is he bleeding was he stabbed is he have some sort of alter no

He just has leeches on him later we go to the hotel which is called the Bodega Bay which is just a fun word to say Bodega Bay KY Lewis meets a psychic douchebag looking guy and a couple other people and they’re all just like hey who’s Neil which is a fair question like

We haven’t been introduced to him yet who the [ __ ] is Neil and Neil he’s just dead he just killed himself already and then while they’re in the elevator the psychic sees like a rape that happened years earlier but don’t worry about it has nothing to do with the movie or

Anything to do with the plot the psychic just gets super horny for the other guy and then he just says no and then she just continues to press on and then we go back to Neil who’s the second guy that killed himself and in his casket there’s just a painting of The Last

Supper for some reason and then pin head just kind of crawls out of his casket what was he doing in the casket and then there’s a dinner scene where this lady tells a a real sad story and then we cut to Pinhead who grabs a fire poker and he

Just lightly Taps a woman on the head and blood just sprays everywhere and she dies we cut to the lady who owns the Bodega Bay who is married to Neil you remember Neil he’s the second guy and he’s just kind of sitting there watching

Her lay down on a couch then we see some random nudity and then we finally get to see puppets running around killing people in the Bodega Bay so the psychic and the douchebag guy finally decide to have sex and she ties him up to the bed and blindfolds him then she hears

Something and then she looks under the bed and she gets drilled in the face not that way uh tler he has a drill on his head uh he kills her while the douchebag guy is still tied up Leech Woman pops up and then just spits leeches onto him and

He dies I didn’t know you can die from leeches oh I forgot to mention there is a blonde lady who steal Neil’s body uh but don’t worry about it it doesn’t make sense she just gets killed so then we come to the conclusion where all the corpses of everybody we’ve met so far

Are around the table and then huy Lewis and the one lady come in and then we find out that Neil is actually still alive and he’s trying to possess the puppets and then the puppets turn on them kill them and then Huey Lewis and the one lady make it out Puppet Master

One one year later we had Puppet Master 2 and we have six dead bodies one Undead body two breasts one guy butt starring blade Jester pin head Leech Woman tuner torch Mesto it’s a flashback and JY the humongous humongous hum humongo humongous JY yeah you’re not going to

See him too much written by Dave pan directed by Dave Allen so we start off in a graveyard where all the puppets dig 6 feet deep and pour a mysterious liquid on the grave of Andre tulon you remember Andre he’s the guy who shot himself in

The first movie and then we go back to the Bodega Bay and then two paranormal investigators show up to find out what happened in the previous which is fair enough cuz everybody just mysteriously died then we cut to this farmer and his wife who are just like your stereotypical Hollywood Hillbillies and

Then this lady shows up and she’s just like I’m lost can you tell me where the Bodega Bay is why do you got an electric fence which is a farm it’s a fair enough reason to have an electric fence and then the farmer lady was like we had

Some Critter break in and eat all of our livestock took one of our mules and sure enough ate its brains out and then the lady who showed up is just like animal mutilation maybe it’s a cult why would you ask that that’s so weird and then they don’t answer it they just shrug

Their shoulders and move on and then we’re back at the Bodega Bay where the investigators are just kind of like looking around then we cut to Andre tulan who’s just walking around in the Attic then we actually find out that Andre Tan’s body was buried on the site

Of the Bodega Bay the same place where he shot himself in the first movie and then the weird cult lady shows up and she’s talking to like a bust of Neil the second guy who and then pin head comes up and pulls her down and then the its

Attack her and she looks like she’s more like inconvenient rather than about to face death anyway she dies uh two of the paranormal investigators are about to have sex on a CCTV we see tuner breaking into somebody’s room the guy who’s sleeping he gets his face drilled not

Sexually again he gets killed by tuner the farmer man uh just dies we see Leech Woman just stabbing him the Leech Woman and the farmer woman getting into a fight farmer woman ends up throwing Leech Woman into a furnace and torch shows up and just lights her on fire

Then we cut to some flashback of Egypt and then we get to the best scene in the movie where a kid who is pretending to be Indiana Jones is whipping appear to be a a Nazi doll and then torch shows up who lights a kid on fire was the kid explained

Earlier in the movie no was the kid’s death explained later in the movie no this was just a scene just to kill a kid what the hell and then uh tulan explains his love interest Elsa it’s funny to me torch just goes out of his way just to kill this

Kid and then tulan shows up he has this weird dance scene with this girl also you remember uh the guy who got his face drilled non-sexually his friends don’t really seem to care and then the guy and the girl they end up having sex and then

Blade shows up who kills the guy and then he the girl we cut to uh this other woman who opens up up Ton’s closet and we see this like weird mannequin in there tulon shows up behind her just kind of like and then we see torch uh

He’s about to light the guy on fire but thanks to the power of nudity he shows his guy butt and makes it out safe and then it’s revealed that tulon is trying to turn the woman into a Reincarnation of his wife and then tulan Reveals His face that’s been rotting for over 50

Years look at oh that’s gross and then the naked guy just bashes torch with a fire extinguisher then he has this weird wrestling match with blade and he just throws him down a laundry shoot tulan reveals that he’s going to reincarnate himself and his wife slits his throat

And pours it into a funnel that goes into a man mannequin which I started thinking okay tulon been in the grave for over 50 years how does he have any blood left in his body then I remembered this is a movie about walking puppets so anyway Tan’s in the new body and he’s

Just like look at my body I don’t know why it sounds like Ray Romano and then the puppets just start attacking tulon for no reason and then the naked guy and the girl just escape and then tulon gets lit on fire and he just jumps out of the

Bodega Bay window and kind of turns invisible crazy cult lady she gets resurrected now in the woman mannequin body and she’s taking all the puppets to an institution for mentally ill children spoilers uh this never comes back in any of the movies this is the only time

You’ll see that woman that van or any reference to that institution Puppet Master 2 Puppet Master 3 1991 we have 12 dead bodies two Undead bodies six breasts starring blade Pinhead Leech Woman Jester tunneller six shooter Hitler Jin the hum Mesto written by Charles ban C Courtney Joiner and David Scher directed

By David Scher apparently your name has to be David to direct these movies so this one is also called two long Revenge which apparently in the last movie he didn’t get revenge it was just him [ __ ] around finding out but this one starts off in Berlin in 1941 despite ton

Killing himself in 1939 in the first movie and then this’s guy who kind of looks like blade na Doctor Who’s waiting for this man to die the doctor is trying to create a serum that can bring the dead back to life and and then the blade

Guy he just starts cutting a promo on him and just being a total dick and then the dead guy comes back to life and attacks the doctor and then the blade looking kn a guy he shoots him with an invisible bullet and then we cut to ton

Putting on a puppet show for the kids where it’s just a six armed Cowboy uh shooting Hitler so this guy who’s a total snitch just [ __ ] about it to the Nazis saying it’s anti-hitler and like in the previous ones the puppets are just already kind of alive we finally get a

Reason why they’re alive turns out tulan has a serum that he spreads in h uh puppet it’s vague but there’s it’s it’s a green fluid that brings puppets to life and then tulon gives his wife Elsa a puppet that looks just like her which is meant to be romantic but she says

It’s beautiful but no it’s not that’s just that’s a creepy puppet and then she says the magic phrase I’m never going to leave you never right then we get this random nudity scene where these Nazi women are rubbing down this old fat guy but after that the Nazis show up at

Tan’s house and can you guess what happens next is it a tulon gives them the green liquid and lives out the rest of his life B the Nazis buy the green liquid from tulan and becomes a millionaire or C the Nazis kill Elsa and kidnap tulon if you guess C

Congratulations you’re right and then while they’re in the car tler kills one of the Nazis and then pin head just strangles the other one the car crashes and then tulan and the puppets Escape which by the way the first two movies I’m pretty sure the puppets were bad

Guys cuz they were just killing random people at the Boda Bay now they’re killing Nazis uh I think they’re good in this one uh anyway the Nazis are now on the hunt for too long and his puppets then the Nazis show up at Tan’s house and just burn his whole house down just

To kind of fast forward through the story tulan cries the doctor looks at the green liquid and calls tulon a genius Nazis search for tulon at this moment tulan goes from crazy Puppeteer to crazy man who I’m going to kill the entire Third Reich and now it makes

Sense why it’s called Ton’s Revenge Pinhead just strangles a guy Jester stabs a guy then tulon has the puppet that looks like his wife and he brings that to life and he’s like staring at it like I’m going to [ __ ] that puppet then the snitch guy from earlier gets killed

By the puppets which like finally like [ __ ] that guy and then we’re at Like A Nazi brothel where tulan pretends to be a blind man and he drops off six shooter six shooter shoots the Nazi General the the fat guy who was in the tub um and he

Shoots him out of the window and there’s this like little boy who’s introduced and he’s just kind of like hanging out with tulon and then the uh the guy shows up and he just kind of threatens tulan with the puppets it’s revealed that tulan figured out how he can give life

To puppets after his visit in Egypt still doesn’t really make sense why they just want to kill random people I mean it makes sense why they want to kill Nazis anyway tulan and the doctor escape and then the doctor gets stabbed by a Nazi and then we go back to another

Flashback from the Egypt time uh nothing really happens and then that kid that was introduced earlier he just kind of pledges allegiance to tulon and then the Nazis break into Ton’s little hiding area puppets just kill all the Nazis and then tulon makes it to where the Nazi

General who kind of looks like BL and the best kill in the entire series all the puppets hook up hooks to the the guy that looks like blade up and they kind of hoist him up like he’s a marionette they light him on fire and drop him down

And he’s dead final scene is uh tulon and the little boy are on their way out of Germany to France Puppet Master 3 puet Master 4 we have three dead bodies three dead demons zero breasts movie starring blade pin head Jester tunneler six shooter decapitron written by Charles ban Stephen e Carr Todd

Hensel Keith s pacon Joe Duffy and Douglas arosi that’s a lot of people who wrote this movie directed by Jeff Burr before I get started the tagline in the movie is when bad puppets turn good uh I’m pretty sure the puppets were good in the last one where they killed Nazis so

We open up with a who’s talking about how he wants to steal back the power from tulan this set piece looks amazing it looks straight out of a GU music video the demon looks like a character from gu so then it’s kind of explained that tulon learned how to create life in

Puppets from demons then we cut to people driving in the rain and somebody touches the Box not not a sex joke like there’s an actual box then we see a generic woman doctor who’s working at Science Inc and she gets a package and it’s a demon and then the demon just

Blues all over her face that’s not a sex joke there’s like Blue Mist all over her face and then now we’re back at the Bodega Bay Rick is your stereotypical 9s genius and he’s at the Bodega Bay creating laser tag robots listening to metal dude this guy’s awesome and then

We see blade just watching him and as he’s just playing laser tag then we see another docor gets the same demon as the lady earlier and then Rick’s girlfriend shows up and he’s thinking he’s going to get lucky but then she brings in like her friend and then this guy who I’ll be

Honest I just want him to die I’m waiting for this guy to die and his first line is rickster so then Rick explains that he’s the caretaker of the Bodega Bay during the off season and then the douchebag guy says I’m starved where’s Denon dude just some somebody killed this guy already the

Doctor opens up the furnace thing and then the demon jumps out and kills a blade running around the Bodega Bay he looks out the window and he SE ton who’s saying like hey I’m going to show up in the movie later and then the douchebag’s girlfriend she finds blade just laying

On the floor and she’s like hey where did the this come from and then Rick essentially just blows her off and says like hey want you go in the storage room and then she finds this box and then she passes out and then she says like please

Don’t open the trunk and which he just completely disregards and just opens anyway the douchebag’s girlfriend gets scared so then the two girls leave and then the douchebag says what the [ __ ] are you so scared of women can’t live with him can’t shoot them I just want really want this guy to

Die I get there trying to make him unlikable but God damn this guy is so annoying I’m waiting for this guy to die please die oh uh and then tulon just kind of shows up in the Mist Rick decides to put acid on the the chest

They open up the trunk and then they find the uh Nazi passport that tulan stole from the previous movie and then Rick finds Ton’s Exposition diary and then Rick who is not a scientist who just kind of thumb through the diary decides hey I’m just going to take this

Random green liquid and inject it to all the puppets and bring them to life and then the puppets all come to life and then pin head tries to kill the douchebag guy just that close then the guar demon shows back up and he says everybody has to die power goes out and

Rick’s girlfriend is like hey we should just call it a knight which is a logical thing you do after you bring a bunch of Puppets back to life so the douchebag decides to bring the trunk into his room and then Rick decides to give all the puppets some sweet upgrades he uh wants

To play laser tag with him which is exactly what I would do and then these are the most fun the puppets have been cuz they’re not killing anybody they’re just playing laser tag one of the boxes from uh that was sent to the scientists earlier shows up at the Bodega Bay then

The douchebag decides to make his girlfriend summon demons from a Ouija board and then they summon the the demon creatures to life and then finally the douchebag guy died I’m kidding he’s still alive they just make it out pin head and blade then scare off the demon

So uh the douchebag and his girlfriend decide to leave they get in the car it’s not starting so then the feminist of a man douchebag guy decides to send his girlfriend out to push and then she doesn’t really debate him which like explains a lot of their relationship of

Like how does he treat her and then the douchebag locks the door and then finally one of the Demons kills the douchebag which are the demons the bad guys to me they’re kind of the good guys and then the douchebag’s girlfriend comes running in telling everybody the

Good news that the douchebag guy is Dead Rick goes outside to check on douchebag and then gets attacked by one of the Demons but he manages to fight it off and then we get a fight scene between the puppets and uh the demon pin head blade and tunneler all work together to

Mutilate this demon the puppets open up a box revealing a new puppet which they bring to Life by Shocking together with electricity and then they kill another one of the Demons with the light in puppet which is known as decapitron the puppet’s head turns into Ton’s head and then decapitron or ton

Then says to Rick I am with you and he gives another Exposition dump Rick’s girlfriend then kills one of the Demons then they kill the other demon with electricity and then decapitron who now has Ton’s head tells Rick that he is the puppet master and then the puppets now

Belong to him Puppet Master 4 Puppet Master 5 we have four dead body one dead demon zero breath starring blade pin head tuner Jester torch six shooter decapitron written by Charles ban Steven C car Todd henel Keith s pacon Joe Duffy and Douglas aronowski directed once again by Jeff Burr so this

One’s also called the Final Chapter which right Rick’s in prison for the alleged murder of the douchebag guy Rick Recaps the previous movie to the police blade is in the evidence room and he just breaks out which I mean come on he’s they just put a plastic bag over

Him and he has a blade for hand so he can blade escapes then we’re introduced to Rick’s boss who he’s just like tell me what happened with the murders which I get why everybody’s questioning Rick about the murders cuz like like would you believe somebody if they told you

That a bunch of Gremlins just ran around killing all your friends so then Rick tells the boss that there’s a serum that brings all these puppets to life and then he’s reunited with his girlfriend so then they have sex just kidding Rick falls asleep then the big gu demon just

Talks about something uh I don’t remember what he was talking about I was just encased in the whole like set piece so then the next scene I have really no idea what goes on so here’s just a couple of pictures from it rick wakes up and blade is just hanging out with him

And then they decided to go back to the Bodega Bay and then the GU demon cuts his hand open he brings another demon back to life boss guy he brings in the team of dudes to break into the Bodega Bay and then the one guy I’m pretty sure

He was one of the rapists in Pulp Fiction and there’s a guy that like kind of looks like Dave Chappelle so anyway the boss guy kind of revealed that he’s going to be the main villain of the story and then all of his cronies are just kind of looking around the hotel

Fake Dave Chappelle is killed by one of the Demons pin head punches the rapist from Pulp Fiction blade and six shooter tell Rick about the boss and all of his goons rapist guy for from pul fiction gets hit in the dick another guy gets killed by one of the Demons boss guy

Kind of like runs away and hides blade and torch fight one of the Demons Rick and his girlfriend are reunited and then they bring decapitron back to life blade stabs one of the demons and he just kind of shoots up out in the air the rapist

From Pulp Fiction is crawling out of the elevator Ton’s head shows back up on decapitron tulon as decapitron tells Rick that uh leave the puppets be they can defend themselves then Rick his girlfriend and the boss all in the elevator and they uh start to leave and

Then Rick and the boss start brawling into the elevator boss escapes the elevator and as the boss escapes out he walks right into Tor who just lights him on fire and he falls down the Elevator Shaft and dies then one of the Demons shows up in the elevator and he tries to

Attack Rick and then decapitron with a new head shows up so decapitron and blade just beat the [ __ ] out of this demon and then the demon tries to open up a portal and Escape but uh luckily he stopped the last remaining demon is Rick just Stomps on his head then it cuts to

Rick’s girlfriend who’s wearing a very ’90s outfit she shows up she meets up with Rick and he’s with all the puppets and they’re saying like everything’s going to be fine now Ton’s head pops back up over decapitron head and then he says he pledges allegiance to Rick the new puppet master Puppet Master

5 curse of the Puppet Master we have bad bodies zero breasts one Wang doodle starring blade pin head Leech Woman Jester tunneler torch six shooter written by Benjamin Carr and David scholer and directed by Victoria Sloan wait no it’s actually David DDO um so dudes took that one away from him so we

Start off the movie where the puppets are behind cages and they’re by bars that are like big enough for them they can easily just get out of and then we’re introduced to a guy who I thought was too long but it turns out it was just some random old guy puts a puppet

In a box and takes it out in the middle of nowhere and just lights it on fire and for some reason we can hear the puppet screaming as it’s being burn wait are are the puppets alive can they feel pain and then we’re in a gazebo he’s the

Guy I thought was too long the grandfather which later find out that that’s her dad then we cut to this really nice car pulling up into a gas station we meet this guy who’s like your stereotypical ’90s bully his gang of uh dudes just get out and they just start

Bullying this guy tank and they never really specifically say but I think tank might be developmentally delayed the bully and the dudes decide to call the one girl the [ __ ] and then they threatened to fight the dad these guys definitely hung out with the douchebag from part four also Tank’s boss also

Kind of bullies them too tank hasn’t done anything to anybody all he was doing was just minding his own business just whittling away we find out that tank tank is getting paid $30 a week to work here so then the dad tells tank hey I’m going to pay you

$35 a week if you come with me and Whittle some stuff Dr mcru decides to show tank and his daughter all the puppets that are in cages also the daughter picks up pin head like he’s a cat Mr mcru explains that he bought the puppets from an auction which how did

They end up at an auction after living with that random woman from part two two cops who show up and start bullying tank because apparently tank is the world’s punching bag so mcru has a bunch of people around him and he’s have six shooter who’s just shooting around a

Bunch of random civilians and this is the same puppet who shot a Nazi and sending him out of a window so then one of the cops puts his gum on pin head’s head the daughter and Pinhead are like best friends and she continuously holds

Him like a cat Mr mcru is like hey I’m going to pretty much make you my slave and pay you $35 a week to make me some puppets also tank like the Widow little carvings and you’re asking him to make full Siz puppets like what the [ __ ] dude

Mr mcru tells tank if you make these puppets they will come to life and tank rightfully so just goes what the [ __ ] and then Mr mcru says you want to know how to make a dead thing live you just have to put your soul into it which if I

Was tank I would get the hell out of there cuz the $35 a week is not worth hanging out with this insane man but the movie has to happen so tank stays and he starts whittling all these little puppets a dinner scene where Mr mcru is just just talking about how cool blade

Is and then Mr mcru also says that the world would be better if we were all just puppets right away this guy’s insane like you got to get away tank so then the daughter takes tank to bed which uh you think they’re going to do it and

They don’t tank whittling away in the workshop the daughter comes in she’s trying to get Tank’s attention she’s saying the house is on fire I’m naked and then he just accidentally slices his hand open like after completely distracting him causing him to injure himself she trying to clean up the blood

And she says like oh you have strong hands and he says yeah they come with the rest of me tank continuously keeps having these dreams where he’s becoming a puppet and like these are pretty terrifying there’s this whole like weird relationship between tank and the daughter uh and

They just keep running away from each other and just they’re just really awkward with each other tank and the daughter find the remains of the puppet that was burned in the beginning of the movie and then the ’90s bully and his boys are just hanging out drinking years

There’s just guys being dudes the daughter comes up and then they just start trying to sexually assault her and then tank shows up and he just grabs the 90 bully by the throat and he’s just like he has murder in his eyes like he has been pushed around so much he’s been

The world’s punching bag tank is about to cut loose the ’90s bully is just bench pressing 30 lbs and he’s just talking to himself and he’s saying the most insane [ __ ] that’s right do it [ __ ] I said do it like yeah that’s right oh yeah you like that don’t you

The ’90s bully breaks into the daughter’s room Pinhead shows up and starts strangling him and then they wrestle outside and then bully just throws pin head on the ground and just Stomps the [ __ ] out of him Blade slashes the 90s Bully’s eyes tuner just drills him in the dick Tang saves Pinhead now

Dialogue scene where mcru and the daughter are talking about something the two cops show up at the boy’s house and they just start accusing them of killing the ’90s bully so the daughter leaves to go pick up something for her dad tank wakes up butt ass naked strapped to a

Table with Mr McGrew just kind of hanging out off to the side then it’s revealed that Mr mcgr is going to take Tank’s soul and put it into the puppet that tank has been making the cops show up at Mr mcgrew’s House blade and tuner just come in and just kill the cops

Immediately which which is cool cuz like the cops were kind of dicks tank strapped to the table butt ass naked so he’s begging for his life daughter who arrives to pick up the thing for her dad and then surprise it was just a ruse to get out of the house there wasn’t

Anything to pick up it was just a distraction so Mr mcru can have tank butt ass naked on the table so then Mr mcru sucks the life out of tank not like that the daughter finds the burnt remains of the last person she her dad

Sucked the soul out of she makes it back to the house but she’s too late and Mr mcru has already sucked the soul out of tank and put it into a robotic puppet and all the puppets turn on Dr mcru and they just decide [ __ ] it we’re going to

Kill you so then the daughter shows up at the house and she finds her dad all like sliced up and bleeding and begging for help and then she sees tank as this like robotic puppet now tank shoots electric at mcru he dies curse of the Puppet Master retro Puppet Master we have eight

Dead bodies kind of three Undead bodies zero breasts saring blade pin head Leech Woman Jester Dr Death Cyclops tunnel and shooter written by Charles ban Benjamin Carr and David scholer directed by David aoto all right so we’re like several movies in and I know what you’re

Thinking we need an origin story so we start off with the origin story of the Puppet Master himself Andre tulon this time he’s played by um uh who is he played by worry about it man don’t touch me mother get out oh hi Mark so Andre Dulan is sitting in front

Of all his puppets and he decides to tell them the entire plot of the movie we’re just about to watch so we go back to Egypt in the early 1900s so there’s this sorcerer guy and he stole the secret of life and he’s trying to escape these weird guys and then the sorcerer

Has like this like weird magical battle with the two guys but the best part is the two guys all they do is just repeat after each other die sorcerer die sorcerer die sorcer they were introduced to these three mummies they wear trench coats glasses hats and part of me I kind

Of wanted them to do a three stooges routine throughout the entire movie mummies are now on the hunt for the sorcerer guy and then we jump to Paris where we meet Andre tulan and Greg cesto gives his performance in the room a run for its money and he gives this amazing

French accent yes it’s late you see I’m very busy anyway he’s putting out a play and in the crowd is this beautiful woman who eventually becomes Elsa oh and uh the play he’s putting on is Dante’s Divine Comedy and I’ll admit I read Dante’s Divine Comedy it is not funny at

All there’s not one fart joke not one dick joke nobody’s falling downstairs the sorcerer is just getting jumped by a bunch of people and then Elsa chases him off so then tulon helps the Sorcerer And then in exchange the sorcerer gives tulon the secret of life and when you

Get the secret of life rather than helping out friends family or people who are just dying left and right no you bring puppets back to life so tulan grabs all of his favorite puppets and so then the mummies find the sorcerer guy and the Sorcerer kills himself with his

Magic powers so then tulan and all his puppet Bros just leave and they just live happily ever after and he makes a million dollars just kidding the mommy find him and then they start harassing him so I I think uh the mummies actually want their own puppets uh but anyway

They kidnap Elsa so then tulan gives a pep talk to the puppets and he kind of makes himself as this like Captain America like figure and we shout to be Avengers and this is The Avengers movie we’ve been waiting for Dulan goes to talk to El’s dad he says hey don’t go

After her and then they just knock him out and throw him out in the woods and you think it’s a big deal but like tulan just wakes up and just goes like oh yeah you get knocked out thrown in the woods that’s that’s what you do and then one

Of the mummies gets killed by a chandelier and then we get to the big conclusion where the two remaining mummies have Elsa tied up on a train and we get this amazing fight scene where tulan just punches the [ __ ] out of one of these mummy so then it ends with the

Older tulan hinting at another movie explaining the rest of the puppets but uh spoilers it doesn’t happen retro puppet master so I got to say we’re on day eight right now and last night I had a dream where I was attacked by a bunch of Puppets I’m not sure if I’m just

Watching so many of these movies that they’re now burrowing into my brain or what or if I’m going insane anyway let’s get on to the next one puet Master the Legacy we have one dead body that’s right one dead body zero breaths and largely archived footage of the other puppets directed by

Charles ban so before we start off I will say this movie is largely archived footage so this is essentially just like a previously on we start off with a woman in a dark room on the phone reading a book and then we cut to a flashback and then we go back to the

Present and the book catches on fire and do you remember the kid from from part three well anyway he’s now an old man boy man is now in the basement of the Bodega Bay which by the way I don’t understand the working hours of the Bodega Bay like it seems like it’s

Always closed nobody has a reason to be there except for my boy Rick who was just there as like a caretaker and he just wanted to play laser tag but everybody just keeps going there just to [ __ ] around and then they end up getting killed so then the woman comes into the

Workshop and she threatens the boy man and wants the formula for herself and the formul is this big McGuffin in the entire franchise where everybody wants it I mean it did bring back to lawn back in part two um uh the series kind of forgot

About that one and then we go back to footage from previous movies so we get a shot of the lady and then goes back to a previous movie so then there’s a scene where boy man and the woman are arguing and then it cuts back to a scene from

Part three where it plays for the next I [ __ ] you not it plays for the next 21 minutes so then we go back and the woman shoots the boy man in the leg and then she talks about how dangerous tulan is and then we go back to a previous movie

So then we get a scene where the woman is just threatening the boy man and then we go back to old movies and then we get the reveal that the woman killed my boy Rick off screen he’s the best character in the franchise and you just kill them off

No I loved Rick he was the goddamn hero of this franchise and you killed him so we don’t even get a flashback of the lady killing my boy Rick but we do get a flashback from another movie for the next 10 minutes the boy man just smacks

The woman and takes her gun and then we go back to another movie so then we go back and it’s revealed that the woman’s entire plot is that she wants the formula not to bring the puppets to life but to bring back the dead which is a fairely reasonable request but instead

Of getting a conclusion to that we go back to more movies so do you remember the ending of part two where all the puppets just randomly attacked ton cuz he transferred his body into another puppet it turns out living as a puppet is just pure hell and like they didn’t

Want tulan to live that way so they just murdered him which I mean it it makes sense now but it took so long to get there so then now we get the boy man who’s pointing a gun and he just fires it off and the woman dies and then I

Would say it cuts the credit but it doesn’t it’s just a big thank you card for watching our movies so the movie was 71 minutes in length and 13 of those minutes were new footage and the rest were all flashbacks this movie is a piece of [ __ ] art the fact that they

Clearly shot this in one day stitched it together with previous movies and put it on a shelf and sold it as a movie and people bought it that is hilarious and absolutely amazing Puppet Master the Legacy Puppet Master versus demonic toys we have five dead bodies zero breaths

Starring blade pin head Jester six shooter and the toys baby oopsie Jack Attack and Teddy movies also starring wait that Cy Feldman written by C Courtney Joiner and directed by Ted Nicolo so puppet Master versus demonic toys is the long awaited brawl we’ve been waiting for between puppet master

And demonic toys and would you know this is a Christmas movie uh one second okay good dude I am so glad they got Corey Feldman for this movie cuz he understands the assignment and he knows exactly what type of movie he’s and throughout the entire movie Cory felman’s speaking like he’s like goddamn

Batman and besides for a cop she was hot so it’s revealed that Cory Feldman is the great grand nephew of Andre tulan so he’s managed to get his hands on Tan’s diary and he’s trying to recreate the formula with his daughter so he Pricks his finger puts it in the

Formula and then he turns to his daughter and says are we weird yeah yeah you are they start processing the formula lady bug with a little hidden camera in it and then we cut to Sharp toys Factory sharp toys oh now I get it then we’re introduced to

Miss sharp who’s the villain of the story and she’s with a henchmen and they’re just watching Cory Felman so then Corey and his daughter they inject all the puppets and bringing them back to life also there’s a line Cory Felman calms her down says don’t worry they’ve been protecting the tulon family for

Generations they’re more like Guardian Angels we’re just going to ignore uh Puppet Master part two where they all stabbed and killed them two henchmen from sharp toys break into Cory felman’s house and then and then SI shoo just start shooting them up and then causes a

Big fire and they escape then Cory comes in he puts out the flames and then the cop just busts in with a gun pointed at him nobody called the cops so then we get the sharp lady and her henchmen taking this little girl down An Elevator Shaft into like this dungeon yeah this

This girl’s going to die and I [ __ ] you not the girl is motorboated by baby oopsy the sharp puts the girl into an Iron Maiden her blood leaks out and then she makes a call out to a demon not the demon from part five and part four the

You know the GU demons uh this is like some like Helen looking demon so then Cory Felman tells the cop lady to lie on her report and then he oddly checks her out the puppets tell Corey that there’s a you know the ladybug with the camera

Then it just bursts in the Flames so then Cory does some hacking and then he finds out that the bug was sent from the sharp toys and then his computer just explodes Cory Felman his daughter to pack up all the puppets and they leave they go to Grandma’s house it you’ve

Never see the grandma at all Miss sharps father sold his soul to the devil to make sharp toys profitable so then Cory Felman breaks into sharp toys to like infiltrate the place I don’t know why Cory Felman decided to do it rather than sending the puppets I mean they’re

Puppets they can just easily just collapse like Toy Story where sharp toys they make this Christmas doll that they’re going to send out and I think it’s going to like take over the world or like at least kill kids or something it’s very vague so then there’s this

Like big PR event where Miss sharp is donating a bunch of toys out and then she gets an award from the the copom from earlier Cory gets caught by two guards and then he runs away baby oopsy attacks him and then Cory Filman just yeets the baby at the henchmen then he

Bust through the pr event and rightfully so he gets arrested but he’s not in jail that long he just gets out and he’s immediately at the grandma’s house and then he decides to give all the puppets upgrades Cory’s daughter went through a goth phase where she was like really

Into this band called altar of blood which that’s a pretty sweet name for a band then the copom just shoots the bear and then leaves and then baby oopsie is hanging on to the car Cory Felman and his daughter have this awkward conversation about if she’s still a

Virgin and then Pinhead just crushes a pillow it’s not important to the plot I just thought that was a really cool scene copom shows up at Cory felman’s house she gets to see the puppets in action baby oopsy she calls Mrs sharp tells them where they’re at and then now

You think that the puppets are in one spot here comes the Demonic Toys we finally get the fight we’ve been waiting for but no and then Cory Felman has to take a massive [ __ ] so the henchmen they kidnap Cory felman’s daughter and I [ __ ] you not baby oopsie fart propels and

Knocks out Cory Felman what the [ __ ] Cory felman’s daughter is getting taken through the dungeon You’re assuming that she’s going to get thrown into the Iron Maiden Mrs sharp tries to seduce Cory Felman so then Mrs sharp tells Cory Felman I want you to impregnate me and

Like the man of God Filman is he says no and then he immediately gets punched in the dick the puppets escape and they kill some guards a guy grabs Jack in the Box his eyes explodes Corey and the puppets make it to the dungeon oh there was a receptionist earlier that they

Just throw her into the fire the demon from earlier who’s now dressed as Santa Claus and he just starts threatening Cory felman’s daughter but now here we are in the dungeon the puppets versus the Demonic Toys we finally get the fight we’ve been waiting pin head crushes baby oopsy’s head blade

Decapitates the bear Jester just grabs Jack In The Box and just throws him against the wall Cory felman’s in the middle of a fight with a henchman and meanwhile his daughter is in the background like about to die Cory felman’s just losing this fight right now but Mrs sharp she’s unable to drain

Cory felman’s daughter’s blood before the sun rises so the demon grabs Mr Sharp and they spontaneously combust and they go off to hell and then Cory saves his daughter uh they won not because they won the fight but because of the sun came up so Cory Felman his daughter

And the cop lady they all Escape sharp toys the cop lady invites them to Christmas dinner Puppet Master versus demonic toys Puppet Master axes of evil we have seven dead bodies zero breasts starring blade pin head Leech Woman just tunneler ninja Shredder con and geni written by

Charles ban and August white directed by David Cotto so this is the first of what’s known as the axis Trilogy and it and it takes place in 1939 so in the basement of the Bodega Bay we’re introduced to Danny uh Danny’s making sex noises as he’s making furniture for

His uncle and then they just happen to bring up Andre T long and then we get some back story on Danny like he wanted to join the war and fight Nazis but he couldn’t because he had Polio as a kid and then during the conversation the uncle’s like why would Nazis want to

Steal puppets that’s a fair question also the movie takes place in 1939 and they’re talking about going over and fighting Nazis America wouldn’t enter World War II for another 2 years and Puppet Master 3 where tulon escaped the Nazis to come to America took place in

1942 um my brain is hurting whatever you don’t have to think much about it because it’s a movie about killer puppets so rather than how the first movie jumped ahead 50 years after the tulon suicide we just find out what happened directly right after and then

One of of the Nazi spies knocks out Dany so then Dany comes across Ton’s corpse so rather than checking on ton or like calling the police or calling somebody he just checks to make sure the puppets are okay Danny’s brother and he makes it completely racist joke so Danny decides

To leave for a party and they leave all the puppets with their mom the two Nazis who were after tulon meet up with this Japanese geisha woman leader and then they have a debate over who could be the most offensive to the nation they’re representing anyway they decide that the

Nazis should go undercover and pretend to be American and then we cut to Danny who’s in his room and he’s playing with the puppets and discovers the hole in the back of their neck Danny who meets his love interest Beth then we meet Beth spos who’s just a [ __ ] [ __ ] so

Anyway Danny’s pissed off he kicks two Long’s case and then a puppet pops out and the formula is also shown and without even questioning it he just injects the formula into Jester Danny seems smart but like it took him all of 10 seconds to go oh this goes here and

Danny’s reaction to bring a puppet to life is more just like oh wow look at that that’s pretty cool rather than what the [ __ ] did I just do so then Danny has the bright idea to bring Jester to Beth sees Beth laughing and flirting with one of the Nazis from earlier Danny tells

Beth that he’s a Nazi Beth doesn’t believe him Danny decides to follow the Nazi around like a reasonable person Danny follows them to the Japanese leader he overhears them talking about their plan he lets the puppets lose Pinhead steals the plans and then blade stabs one of the Nazis back at Danny’s

House house and he’s just looking over and he discovers what the Nazis plans are and then his brother shows up and he immediately just starts talking about boobs so then Danny communicates with the puppets and they all agree on to stop the Nazis from executing the plan

The Nazis are planning to blow up the plant where Beth works it’s never explained what the plant is it’s just called the plant and then Danny introduces Beth to the puppets and she goes oh wow look those are pretty cool rather than going what the [ __ ] is this

Everybody is just way too accepting of sentient puppets just walking around Danny’s mom and setting up for a party one of the other Nazis comes in and shoots her Danny discovers his mom Danny’s brother is shot Danny then gets the bright idea to infuse his dying brother’s blood into the formula and

Injects the formula and the blood into the mysterious puppet that we found earlier Beth is kidnapped tied up to a chair the Nazi guy he defends Beth from one of the Japanese guys Kabuki lady cuts a promo on the Nazi saying that like he has too many feelings for her so

Danny and the puppets break back into the theater pin head and Tuners they kill one of the Japanese guys so Danny’s brother who’s now a puppet he uh unties Beth lets her free and then he throws a ninja star at one of the guys and then

As uh Danny’s brother as the puppet goes to attack the Kabuki lady she just kills him so there goes Danny’s brother also blade just has a bomb then the Kabuki lady talks about the the bombing of Pearl Harbor which happened in 1941 not 1939 Danny’s brother comes back to life

He kills the last remaining Nazi and then dies for real this time and the Kabuki lady escapes AP with all the puppets except for blade and pin head and that’s it Puppet Master axes of evil Puppet Master X ax is rising we have seven dead bodies two Undead bodies

Zero breaths starring blade pin head Leech Woman Jester tunneler six shooter and Nazi puppets this time Blitz C bombshell we mocked kamakazi wait is that Nigel mcginness like the Nigel mcginness huh holy [ __ ] it really is Nigel mcginness so this one picks up immediately right after the last one the

Kabuki lady running down this dark alley she runs into the Nazis and they immediately take the bag of Puppets away from her and then tuner comes out and drills one of the Nazis in the face and then the Nazi guy just kills the Kabuki lady and then they kind of imply

Necrofilia and then we see Dany and Beth who it took me a couple minutes to realize that they were recast and the new Danny kind of looks like my friend Dan Brown shout out to Dan Brown so then we’re introduced to this hot Nazi who kind of like flirts but yet kind of

Bullies a scientist guy then the hot Nazi says she’s going to give the scientist a big surprise if he does what she wants they never really say but and then this other Nazi who I I think his name is morbius he comes in and threatens the scientist so Dan Brown

And fake Beth are brought in front of this guy he tells them I know you guys were plotting to blow up the plant so then Dan Brown is like I I need to enlist and the scientist is working on a resurrection machine and then morbius uh

Kills a Japanese man cuz they need a body for the resurrection machine to work so they bring the man back to life and he walks for a little bit and then he just immediately dies morbius threatens the scientists again and then he shows him tunneller so then we cut

Back to Dan Brown telling the officer guy uh the plot of the previous movie so the general just automatically believes them and invites him to a dinner and then he just kicks him the [ __ ] out and then we get a scene where the hot Nazis trying to seduce morbius which morbius

Denies her and then she’s piss off saying like oh you’re only concerned about Nazis and Magic which if you’re into those things you’re kind of like asking to be made fun of so morbius and the hot Nazi are about to do it and then they’re interrupted and they’re told

About the secret plan then they come up with a plan to kill the general bring him back to life and use them to plot against the US uh so Dan Brown and fake Beth arrive at the house that so then Dan Brown shows the puppets to the

General guy and then he of course just goes yeah that’s a puppet and then we go to the secret lab where the scientist is looking at tler and then the hot knot shows up the doctor pulls out the green liquid from tuner and then the hot Nazi

Makes out with the scientist and then morbius shows up and kills the hot Nai and then the scientist just like cuddles the hot Na’s body so there’s a scene where Dan Brown and fake Beth just gather all the puppets and then we go back to the scientist so the scientist

Is trying to resurrect the hot Nazi and then the scientist it just looks like he’s just doing random [ __ ] on the switchboard the hot Nazi comes back to life she walks for a little bit and then she just collapses dead and then just rots away morbia shows up he sees what

The scientist did to the hot Nazi and just starts cutting a promo on him so he tells him to bring to life this puppet called bombshell that looks just like the hot Nazi bombshell her power is she shoots guns out of her boobs but bombshell has the accuracy of a

Stormtrooper so Dan Brown and fake breath and the general guy they show up at the scientist place and then bombshell shows up and she starts shooting guns out of her boobs Pinhead gets shot and the scientist he creates a werewolf and than like a tank guy so Dan

Brown and fake Beth are given awards for their heroic actions from the last movie Dan Brown just says hey I I just want to enlist and then at that moment Blitz CRI and bombshell show up and they just start firing everybody blade just starts fighting the werewolf Leech Woman and

Bombshell start fighting Pinhead starts wrestling Blitz CRI and he gets fired away Nazi puppets escape and then the general goes up to Dan Brown and says like you’ve earned your way into the US Army I don’t think that’s how that works so then they go back to the house and

They like hey you know what would make this movie even cooler if we had six shooter and then Dan Brown and the puppets decide to break into the Nazi lab blade stabs one of the guards the puppets fight each other Dan Brown and the guy fights six shooter shoots

Bombshell blade then kills morbius and then the scientist refuses to bring back morbius and then a new puppet named kamakazi shows up dude is that kamakazi dude what the [ __ ] it’s a [ __ ] comic maazi blows up the science lab Dan Brown and fake Beth grabbed the scientist said don’t go

Anywhere they decide to let him go instead of turning him into the army and then it’s revealed that the scientist still has some of the uh green liquid and cut to credits Puppet Master X ax is rising so there is four more movies left and I forget what normal movies are without

Puppets um Puppet Master axes Rising we have 21 dead bodies two breasts starring blade pin head Leech Woman Jester tunneler torch six shooter the Nazi puppets are back bombshell we moed and Blitz cgg written by Roger Baron directed by Charles ban so taking place in 1942 at a

House Dan Brown and fake Beth are immediately killed off what a way to start this movie off then we see this like muscular military guy get called into an office and like the guy his name is Brooks he’s just like just really intense the entire time then we’re

Introduced to a character who looks like Peter Dinklage cosplaying his blade and I [ __ ] you not his name is Dr Ivan ivanof so intense Brooks is told Nazi puppets are on the loose and he has to work with Dr Ivan ivanof then there’s SC where Nazis are talking about somebody

Dying a couple random guys just get killed off and then and then blade just scares the [ __ ] out of Ivan’s daughter and then Brooks this girl and then she’s like a witch that like specializes in sexual magic okay let let’s go with that let’s let’s go with that and it’s unspoken but

It seems like there’s like a I want to [ __ ] you triangle then there’s two Nazis who are torturing a guy and three other Nazis who are just playing cards and there’s like a Nazi who kind of looks like Stephen King Ivan is reading a scroll his daughter’s there Brooks is watching him on

Next scene and then there’s a sex scene this lady has needles in her fingers and she just stabs this guy and then blade is just watching Dr Ivan ivanov’s daughter which is kind of weird Brooks Ivan and the daughter they come face to face with the Stephen King Nazi and he

Wants to turn them all into puppets a six shooter shoots a Nazi Pinhead beats the hell out of the lady Nazi from earlier Leech Woman throws up a leech onto stepen King Nazi and his response is to grab electricity and just electrocute his face and he doesn’t die

He he completely lives so then Brooks meets up with the Stephen King guy and then he just becomes paralyzed and falls to the ground and then Pinhead grabs them by the throat and just chokes the [ __ ] out of them Brooks and the daughter they leave go back home and then they

Put the puppets in a trunk Puppet Master axis Termination three days three movies I only have three more movies to watch I I don’t know if I can do this I may have to abandon this project this is a stupid idea why did I do this why why am I doing this anyway what’s the next one Puppet

Master the littlest Reich we have 36 dead bodies one Undead body six breasts starring Barbara krampton Thomas Lennon blade Pinhead tler Kaiser it’s essentially torch Auto gyro happy amphibian and Junior furer written by S Craig Zer directed by sunny lagona and Tommy Wickland so just like how the Rob

Zombie Halloween movies are its own timeline away from the original Halloween timeline Puppet Master littl less Reich is its own timeline away from the other Puppet Master movie and rather than taking place at the Bodega Bay it takes place at Postville Texas in 1989 it’s my birthday

Actually it’s not stated that it’s July 4th but they never actually say the date so I’m just going to assume it’s my birthday so happy birthday to Me so Andre tulan shows up at a bar and he just orders water with lemon and and then she just starts making out with the other woman bartender which tulon just doesn’t like and then tulon gets pissed off and he just leaves the bartender woman and then her girlfriend they’re

Driving in a car oh [ __ ] that was a major kill so then we see tulan just says come hither and he calls all the puppets to come run after him and horrific murder scene of the two women two cops show up they look around they

See Tiny foot Prince and the guy is just like oh there probably a tiny raccoon and then the lady was like you [ __ ] idiot and then the cops just show up at Ton’s house and they just immediately shoot him and that is a [ __ ] opening during the title credits they kind of

Rewrite history and they tell you that tulan is actually a Nazi and it kind of makes sense why he’s a bad guy also Udo kir plays tulan I just think him playing a Nazi ton is [ __ ] perfect so we cut to present day in Dallas Texas that

Edgar had just recently got divorced and that’s why he’s moving in with his parents so then Edgar goes through his dead brother’s personal belongings and he discovers a blade doll Edgar works at a comic book shop and he like creates his own and also Nelson Franklin’s in

This movie and he’s just hanging out eating a donut so while Edgar’s at his parents house reading a comic book He’s met up with an old friend of his named Ashley they go on a walk together where she’s walking her cat and then Edgar stumbles upon on a to lawn auction and

He grabs the blade doll and it just immediately slices him open then Edgar talks to his parents and he finds out that his brother just randomly found this blade doll Edgar’s at work he’s doing research on like where his brother could have found this doll Ashley shows

Up and she just walks up and kisses Edgar and oh by the way they’re dating now so they’re either dating or they’re just really good friends do people kiss their friends I don’t have any friends so Edgar invites Ashley to the tulon auction and then Nelson invites himself

So when they arrive at the hotel the guy at the hotel is just casually anti-semitic names of your reservations under uh there’s two one’s under Easton one’s under marwitz you must be marwitz why cuz I look like a Jew are you Martz yes there’s nothing to be upset about

Now is there dude that’s not cool but you know what is cool sex Edgar and Ashley bone so then they show up to Ton’s house and they are given a tour given by Barbara krampton who was the lady cop from earlier Ton’s backstory tulon and his wife meline not Elsa they

Fled to the US on their way to America meline jumped off the ship killing herself tulon captured kidnapped and tortured Jewish women what the [ __ ] so we go from the previous storyline where tulan was an anti-nazi and he’s escaping the Third Reich to he’s a full-blown oh and throughout Ton’s house they just

Have Nazi Flags everywhere oh and they also tell you that tulon had made over 60 puppets and all 60 puppets are going to be in one place for this auction so then after the tour they get back to the hotel and Edgar and Ashley bone it once

More then they discover that the Box they put blade in Blade is just gone and then in another room those people discover that they had a torch doed escaped and then torch just pops up behind them and lights them on fire and then there’s another couple who are

Having sex and blade shows up and slices the gu’s Achilles heel and then blade just stabs the hell out of the woman and then we cut to a guy watching wrestling who I think that’s Cameron Grimes on screen and then the guy who is watching wrestling he goes to the bathroom to

Take a piss and then he gets his throat lit and his head cut off and his head just drops in the toilet and I [ __ ] you not the guy is just paying on his head oh and the puppet that killed him flies Franklin’s at a bar and he’s trying to

Hit on a woman she just denies him so the bartender tries to console Nelson after being turned down and and I swear and the bartender’s name is cuddly bear the police show up at Edgar’s room they’re getting several reports that puppets are appearing missing but as we

Know the puppets are alive a guy is lying to his mom tell him he’s sober uh he gets killed by a blade lookalike puppet crawls into a pregnant woman’s stomach and then busts out through the stomach alien style which is uh kind of horrific but also pretty amazing Edgar

Starts walking down the hallway and he discovers the guy watching wrestling who was just peed on his head so then Edgar comes to the conclusion that everybody who’s died has been either Gypsy Jewish or gay Nazis hate all those people so it’s you it’s not hard to put the pieces

Together Nelson is in his room with a girl and they discover another blade puppet and it just disappears and then there’s a guy with long hair he gets turned into a puppet so the police gather everybody in the hotel in one room and they tell him we’re under

Quarantine nobody’s leaving so then the power goes out everybody starts to panic bobber krampton pulls out a gun and starts shooting in the air so everybody just bum rushes the door and just leaves the hotel anyway but they discover the gate to the parking lot is also locked

So they can’t escape and then the woman’s torso cut open by a puppet other woman gets inside of her car and then pin head just bunches through her head then these two ston guys get in a car and want to get stabbed in the dick by

Fake blade cuddly bear he sees a kid whose mother’s been killed he tries to save her but then the another puppet just slices off the kid’s hands and his little hands are still gripping on the cuddly Bear’s back they come up with a plan where Nelson decides to put himself

Up as bait uh so they can capture one of the puppets Barbara krampton hears something she’s walking to a window and she gets mashed in the face by something and then another cop comes to check on Barbara kampton he gets his [ __ ] arm ripped off by pin head guy that was

Turned into a puppet just kills a cop and he just starts shooting everybody so then they just shoot the uh puppet guy and then inside of the woman was a baby with Hitler’s head yeah so then Nelson grabs the Hitler baby and just Chucks

Into an oven and turns it on I see what you did there Barber krampton tells everybody to find a room and hide while they’re in a room they hear a woman screaming for help they go to see her and then they see a pogo puppet just

Jumping up and down on a dead they get attacked by a bunch of Puppets uh pin head beats the [ __ ] out of Nelson blade breaks through the ceiling and kills Nelson so they decided to jump out of window into a dumpster uh Edgar makes it Ashley makes it then the girl that

Nelson was with smashes her face on the side of a dumpster Edgar and Ashley uh steal a truck they escape the hotel Barbara krampton is attacked and killed hudley bear is attacked and killed Edgar and Ashley just ran the truck into a mausoleum which stops the puppets from

Being alive out of the mum walks mummified ton immediately just kills Ashley by shooting her in the head the zombie ton just walks out into the middle of the woods and then it cuts to then Edgar’s doing a signing of his comic book retelling the movie We just

Watched then a Tob continued title pops up on the screen and as of this recording it’s been six years since this movie came out and we have yet to hear anything of a sequel and I think it’s a travesty I love this movie this is my

Favorite puppet master and I want to see a sequel now Puppet Master the littlest Reich day 14 two more movies Blade the Iron Cross we have 14 dead bodies four Undead bodies three breasts starring blade that’s it it’s it’s it’s a blade Solo movie so it’s just just blade

Written by Brockton Kenny directed by John leago so we start off with Eliza waking up in bed Eliza is Dr Ivan Ivan off’s daughter from the termination movie and she’s having dreams of the previous Puppet Master movies wait didn’t I just experience that then she writes a letter to her Father which is

Dr Ivan Ivanov and then she lights the letter on fire and if you had Nazi scientists in a lab on your bingo card you can officially check that one off Nazi scientist experimenting with the the green tulon liquid and we’re in day 14 now and I should have taken note of

How many doctors are trying to recreate Ton’s serum instead of just counting boobs anyway there’s a guy who’s threatening to kill one of the Nazi guys and then he escapes and then he’s eaten by a zombie so so there’re zombies now then we get a shot of modern day

California despite it being in the 1940s that Eliza is a reporter and her boss who is like just straight out of a comic book he’s just super horny for some reason and he’s saying if it bleeds it leads so right about murder so Eliza and another guy they go to investigate the

The dude that got eaten by a zombie so Eliza and the guy are taken into custody and they’re put in into a room where they’re being questioned and then the guy just leaves just because he asks politely the lieutenant who’s there to question them he starts flirting with

Eliza and it works and she just makes out with him you know like a reporter would do then we cut to a scene where Eliza is being stalked by the cop that threatened to beat her up he’s just watching her brush her hair and then Eliza flirts with blade like kind of a

Little too much Eliza just seductively sharpening blades um blades I’m not sure why this is so sexual after all he is a Nazi Doctor Who was put into a doll’s body she touches the blade she cuts herself and just bleeds all over her boobs so the cop who is stalking Eliza

Now goes to rat honor to some mysterious guy in Black were just thrust into blade and Eliza are now just mentally connected they didn’t really explain it it just just sort of happened and you don’t have to think too much about it because it’s a movie about killer puppet

So of course blade just kills him right away so two stoes show up and they just come across a mutilated corpse of the cop and they’re just like oh how about that and then it cuts to another shot of modern day California in 1945 and then the lieutenant from earlier he shows up

At this Nazi Clubhouse and he fights a zombie and this Lieutenant is like the coolest [ __ ] dude in the movie because he fights this zombie and not once does he lose his toothpick in his mouth and then like two horny co-workers decide to just bang at Eliza’s apartment

She just has like all these scars all over her chest and then as they’re about to do it she just slices herself open again and just bleeds all over this guy then she just shoves the guy’s face into her chest some more stoes come in they

Grab the guy to take him away sliced up booby woman uh she’s just there to find blade and blade is just hanging out outside of the window and then the lieutenant shows back up at Eliza’s work and then one by one all the other reporters just pass out and then Eliza

And the lieutenant they end up passing out two guys in gas masks show up and they take Eliza and the lieutenant to can you guess where a warehouse then Liza wakes up she’s tied to ch hair just completely butt ass naked like like fully butt ass

Naked like with her whole butt ass out why is she butt ass naked in oh and now there’s a Nazi death ray plot going on he threatens to shock Eliza unless she gives him uh tulon secret so of course she refuses and then he just electrocutes her and then they tell us

That her waveform is special I I I don’t know what that means but she uses her bio energy to have have blade cut the lieutenant loose what’s bio energy and then they unleash some some Nazi zombies out then one of the Nazis is eaten by a zombie but also

Sounds like he’s just you know getting off meanwhile the guy is still like shocking Eliza and the liutenant is watching Eliza get electrocuted in the entire time he’s just like oh man this is [ __ ] up but it’s also kind of hot but anyway blade Cuts Eliza loose and

She’s free this poor girl finally gets some clothes on so since Eliza and blade now have a connection when Blade’s face gets thrown into a furnace she feels that pain blade is just thrown onto a table and just smashed with a sledgehammer so then blade just somehow

Reemerges out of the na scientist’s body and just busts out and he he has no mark on him whatsoever and then we find out that if the Nazi scientist were to die a deathray bomb was going to go off so Eliza the lieutenant and blade had have

To scramble to figure out how to stop this bomb from going off so they just say [ __ ] it and they just leave the warehouse and they just leave blade to like screw up with the bomb death ray is destroyed Eliza writes an article about it Eliza writes a final note to her

Father Dr Ivan ivanof and then blade kills the man in Black from from from earlier and that’s it Blade the Iron Cross I did it I did it I didn’t think I could do it there times I was going to bail and just say [ __ ] it but I did it I soldiered on I made it through over two weeks 15 movies I watched them all I finally did it I have completed

This Challenge and I am done who put the shirt on me where did these come from I’m I’m going mad I I’ve watched way too many Puppet Master movies but with that being said Dr Death we have nine dead bodies two Undead bodies IES 15 breasts kind of I

I’ll get to it and starring Dr Death that’s it it’s it’s just Dr Death written by James Quinn and directed by Dave Parker we start off there’s this old man he’s in bed he’s freaking out he’s having war flashbacks he has a heart attack and he dies next

Morning we’re introduced to April she’s showing up for her first day of work at this old folks home but like when she gets there she sees the old man that died the night before getting pulled out walks in the supervisor is like hey go put on some scrubs you look like crap

She’s introduced to Flynn who’s like this kind of creepy guy like he’s shaking her hand like a little too long immediately told to start working like no training videos just go right to work she meets Ryan who’s sad he’s crying he’s holding a picture of the old man

That died the night before it turns out the old man has no friends no family no loved ones so they come up with the idea like hey let’s just steal all this [ __ ] so then April opens up a closet door she finds this chest she brings this dusty

Ass chest all over the man’s bed Flynn comes in he’s like what’s in the box what’s in the box what’s in the box so Flynn just takes a hammer he just bashes the [ __ ] out of it they open it up and inside is a Dr Death doll so then Flynn

Is like I’m stealing this thing and I I don’t blame him like I would probably steal a puppet as well we’re then introduced to Jenny who’s like a nurse she starts giving April a tour and introducing her to all the clients this old guy he’s playing golf other client

She’s an artist but she’s like kind of weird she’s painting a painting of April before she even got there there’s this old pervy guy named Tycoon just keeps sexually harassing them and then there’s Miss Belle who can’t speak she had like a stroke or but her thing is she just

Like steals [ __ ] and then missbell like Yanks them back in and she’s like look there’s doct death right here and they’re like you [ __ ] stole this so then they have a memorial service for the guy that died in the beginning of the movie golfer guy goes up he starts

Giving this whole speech meanwhile Miss Bell sees Dr Death in the window April sees her and then she also sees Dr Death and she goes hey who put that Dr Death doll up there and they go what are you talking about you idiot Dr death’s not

There and then April looks and he’s gone then all the employees are having like a break time and Flynn comes in he just starts sexually harassing the girls they shove them and then Dr Death slides across the room he gets up and then he notices Dr Death doll is gone and he’s

Like hey who stole my toy it’s now night time everybody’s asleep we’re in this Belle’s room and the respirator gets yanked off she wakes up she’s gasping she like can’t breathe she’s dying right away meanwhile Dr Death is at the end of the bed just laughing his head off

Like I changed the laugh but it was something like that it was creepy Jenny April and Ryan they hear Flynn screaming they get up and they start running they all wind up in Mrs Bell’s room and they see Mrs Bell clutching the Dr Death doll they’re like you [ __ ] stole this you

Stupid [ __ ] the corner bringing in the body of Mrs Bell and then body bag starts zipping open Corner goes over there to like check on it he gets sliced in the ankles he falls down Dr Death picks up a bone saw and just starts stabbing the [ __ ] out of the corner the

Next day Mrs Bell’s granddaughter shows up and is that the bunny dude the bunny from aew is in this wait is that the blade dude Bunny and the blader in this that’s awesome kind of a missed opportunity to not have the Blade killed by blade so anyway the bunny she walks

Into the Corner’s office to hand off the dress for Mrs Bell’s funeral only to find there’s nothing there she opens up a door the dead coroner falls on top of her and she scream April she comes in to tuck in Tycoon and then Tycoon starts like pointing at the window like hey

Something’s over there April walks over to the window and just as the Lightning Crashes boom Mrs Bell’s like dead rotting face is facing right at her so then April just passes out and she has a dream sequence of the movie Ling up to this point she wakes up the whole staff

Is all around her and they’re like why are you sleeping on the job and she goes I passed out I saw Mrs Bell’s dead body and they’re like Mrs Bell’s dead that’s a sick [ __ ] joke and then the supervisor comes in and she’s like yeah

Uh Mrs Bell is gone we have no idea where her body is the next day Flynn comes in he’s smoking a cigarette and then he notices Footprints are leading up to the Corner’s office so he’s following them Flynn is walking around the Corner’s office he turns around and

He sees Mrs Bell staring right back at him and then she just shoves him into a big pile of boxes he just gets up and goes oh what the hell happened and then Mrs Bell is gone once more finds the do death doll on the ground he picks it up

And just like that scene in Toy Story where Sid picks up Woody and Woody turns his head and he goes like time to play ni said Dr Death does the exact same thing to Flynn and then Flynn freaks out turns around Mrs Bell’s back and she

Stabs him in the face April and Ryan they decide hey let’s just break into his locker they break into his locker and it’s just filled with porn Jenny she comes in she’s talking to Tycoon tycoon’s like hey I’ll give you money if you show me your boobies so then she’s

Like yeah okay you know here’s a boner pill I’ll be back the supervisor she’s walking around the kitchen she hears something in the basement then she trips and falls over Mrs Bell’s body then we see Dr Death at the top of the stairs shut and locks the door Ryan in April

They open up Flint trunk and they find his dead body Jenny walks back into tycoon’s room she gets naked and then she notices Tycoon already has a boner she was like let me take a peek at that she opens it up it’s actually Dr Death

And Dr Death just stabs the [ __ ] out of her Ryan and April they open up the basement door the supervisor comes out she goes Mrs Bell’s body’s down there the supervisor walks into this office she sees this like full-grown man in that looks just like Dr Death like his

Face is like skinned and everything it looks pretty sweet anyway the fullsize Dr Death guy he just stabs the supervisor the fullsize Dr Death he starts stalking Ryan in April Ryan gets into a fight with the full-size Dr death April grabs defibrillators and just shocks the [ __ ] out of fullsize Dr Death

Just falls down Ryan leans in so he can hear him and then he gets stabbed in the head then it’s reveal that inside the full-size Dr Death is the Dr Death puppet puppeting the Dr Death and that was as the full-sized Dr Death is approaching April she just stops and

Smiles and says I’ve been waiting for you and it’s revealed that she’s the great great granddaughter of tulon she has this like Sinister smile and she’s like time to get the rest of the puppets and then it cuts amazing Dr Death throughout this challenge watching every single Puppet Master movie I decided to

Write my own puppet master movie did Charles B ask me to do it no but I was like I got it going to a ton of horror conventions I can tell you there’s a crossover between horror fans and wrestling fans and being somebody who is well versed in both worlds and I now

Have experience in the Puppet Master world I wrote a pretty unique yet familiar take on the Puppet Master franchise hell with full moon shooting movies at a property right next door to me I’m not too far so Charles ban hit me up what is that noise hello hello who’s there hey

Brody how did you get there oh damn it ah a ah a ah

This video I embarked on my greatest challenge yet. Watching every PUPPET MASTER movie ever made, with one movie per day, and trying to hold together my sanity. Enjoy!

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